Apocalypse Seven Hundred
by silversundown
Summary: Instead of running into Aaron after Terminus, the group stumbles across Xander and Faith instead. Trust isn't an easy thing to earn in this world, especially when your new acquaintances seem to be hiding something at every turn. Buffy crossover with quite a bit of Caryl.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own them!

This wasn't exactly what he had in mind when they left that morning for an impromptu supply run. Truth be told they weren't even supposed to be out right now but Dawn had convinced both himself and Faith that it was the little things that mattered and there were a few specific little things they all needed to boost moral.

Xander riffled through the empty boxes and containers on the convenience store shelves. The place had been picked over pretty well already but there was always a chance of finding a few hidden treasures.

They'd been given a long list of potential items to grab along with specific instructions to "pilfer anything that looks happy or tastes sweet" whatever that meant. He spied a bag of red vines in the far corner of a shelf and pondered if they looked happy enough. They were certainly sweet depending on your preference.

He grabbed the candy and tucked it away in his pack with the few other things they'd managed to find so far before turning to join Faith, who was currently occupying the beauty care aisle on the other side of the building. No doubt looking for more brunette hair dye to touch up her roots along with an armful of boxes for the other girls.

When he'd questioned her one day about why any of them bothered anymore she'd looked at him like he was stupid and really should know by now. "Because I wanna feel sexy during apocalypse seven hundred, ok."

Maybe it was one of those 'little things' that seemed to be in precious little supply these days.

While pondering the benefits of red vines and hair dye he rounded the corner and nearly ran smack into the chest of an entirely new person. They both jumped back a step and stared at one another as if they'd suddenly grown seven heads between them. Hands reached for weapons and it didn't take long for the new guy and himself to be caught in a stand off at the end of aisle four.

Xander sized up his opponent from over the barrel of his own gun and quickly came to the conclusion that he'd be pretty well fucked if he'd been here alone. This man was at least half a foot taller, which in itself wasn't hard to accomplish, but the rest of the package was enough to make Xander wish he'd spent more time at the gym before the turn. Rippling arm muscles were not his thing, but they most certainly were this guy's thing, as was the biker attire, crossbow and disgruntled expression that seemed to be conflicted between shooting him on principle alone or giving him a chance to speak his peace.

"Found a live one over here!" He called out to whoever was in his traveling party and Xander was quickly greeted by the faces of several other people. Apparently this store was the place to be today.

He raised one hand in surrender and slowly, very slowly holstered his weapon. He was outgunned here by a long shot.

"Hey there, new people." He tried with an easy smile that the biker merely grunted at and the others side eyed.

"Where'd you come from?"

This question was thrown at him from who he assumed was the leader. An overgrown beard and wary expression wasn't enough to hide the fact that he had authority over the small group. If there was one thing Xander could recognize it was an alpha personality. He'd spent most of his life living amongst hordes of them.

"Just doing some shopping. I come in peace."

"That's not what I asked. Where'd you come from and are you alone here?"

"He's really not." Faith appeared in the aisle behind Xander, sending a disapproving look in his direction as she closed the distance between them. "Seriously? I leave you for five minutes."

He simply shrugged at her. "What can I say, I'm a popular guy."

The leader was frustrated now and the appearance of Faith seemed to make his trigger finger itch. "One of you needs to answer me right now."

"I'm Faith, he's Xander. We're probably here doing the same shit as you. Scavenging. Looking for food. We're alone. We don't want trouble."

The words she spoke were placating but the tone in which she spoke them matched the intensity of the man who questioned her and he bristled. "We don't either but we're kind of at a crossroads here. Do you have a camp?"

He bit out the words, clearly expecting a straight answer this time and Xander let his eyes roam over the rest of the group.

The biker and the leader in front, weapons drawn. An Asain man and brunette woman off to the right, hands on their guns but pointing them downward. A black woman with dreadlocks next to a man with shocking red hair that had to come from a bottle and a smaller woman in the tiniest shorts he'd ever seen. A gray haired pixie a few steps behind the biker. A child in a cowboy hat two sizes too big.

A smattering of others further behind.

They all looked a few turns of bad luck away from being walker meat or dropping dead from starvation. He could almost see the outline of ribs through the t-shirt on the pixie.

Even without the depth perception one has with two functioning eyes it wasn't hard to tell the situation here.

The biker glared at him but didn't comment.

Xander took a moment to look properly scolded for eyeballing anyone's woman and then chanced a glance at Faith who was no doubt having the same thoughts at him. It was pretty easy these days to see who was just surviving and who had nefarious intentions, as Dawn liked to call it.

This group, they were trying to make it. They hadn't shot them yet either despite having a clear advantage. That was something. It had to be.

He cast a questioning look a Faith and she rolled her eyes. "You know what Buffy said."

"Yeah, but I also know what she meant."

They eyed each other a moment longer, the leader and biker getting anxious as each second ticked by but in the end Faith must have seen the same thing he did because she nodded with a long suffering sigh. "Yeah, we got a camp."

The eyes of the group went wide and Xander couldn't tell if they were pleased with this news or terrified of it. They'd all clearly seen better days and it was obvious they were struggling. Trust no one wasn't just a tv slogan anymore. It was real life now. A motto to live by or die trying.

Xander attempted to defuse the situation. "We have walls, food, you're welcome to come with us if you want. It's your choice."

"Why? You don't know us."

The distrust in the other man's eyes was palpable and Xander shrugged. "It's what we do. Plus, you haven't shot us yet so that's a few brownie points for you."

Faith cut into the conversation. "You have the advantage here. Maybe we could look at something other than the business end of your guns while you decide. "

The leader eyed the biker and gave him a short nod and they lowered their weapons. "We need details and we need 'em delivered straight. Don't think for a minute this means we trust you."

* * *

Twenty minutes later Xander and Faith had acquired reluctant new traveling companions who's names he'd already half forgotten. They had given enough details to pacify the others, though major facts had been glossed over to protect the innocent.

They were hesitant to accept the offer and he wasn't entirely sure they weren't planning on attempting to ambush the camp once they got there, but a part of him knew that wasn't plan A.

He'd listened to their argument during decision time and heard the hope in a few of those voices. They wanted this to be real. Wanted something solid and positive to hold onto and if it was delivered to them Xander was fairly confident they would take it.

Faith on the other hand did not share his positive outlook. She and Xander where in the front seat of the SUV they'd driven there, with Rick and Daryl behind them. Carol and Michonne in the third row. They had themselves a little convoy now, all headed back to base camp and he met her glare from his seat with one of his own.

"What?"

She handed him the radio and shrugged, her tone unaffected. "You're telling, B. I did it last time and you know what happened. I'm still angry over those Pop Tarts too."

"Who's B?" Daryl spoke up from behind Xander and he met his look in the rearview mirror. "She's our fearless leader."

"And she ain't gonna be happy 'bout this?" Daryl gestured to himself and his people.

"It's not that. She'll understand. It's just been a rough year is all." He raised the radio to his lips and heard Rick click the safety off his gun.

"You start speaking in code or I feel like something is off and we're gonna have a problem."

Xander nodded. Wondered if maybe he was wrong about these people after all.

"Dawn, you there?"

Static crackled over the air and a peppy voice responded in return. "Hey! You guys heading home? You get the stuff for the thing? Because I know it was a lot but I totally didn't expect you to get all of it and…"

He smirked and cut her off. "Easy there. We're fine and yes we got a few things but we also picked up some strays along the way. We'll have guests when we get back."

The radio was silent for a moment before Dawn responded again. "You know what Buffy said."

"Yeah, yeah, I know what she said. You sound just like Faith. I'll talk to her, just let the girls know we're all coming so we don't get a cold welcome. I only got one eye left you know."

"Ok. You want me to tell her too?"

Xander sighed. "Yeah. But…maybe tell her while you're also handing her a coffee and a kitten."

Dawn snorted over the radio. "I can't work magic, you know. That's not my department. Get back safe, you guys."

"Will do. Over and out and all that jazz."

The radio went silent and the entire car followed suit. The energy was tense and Xander suddenly wished they'd picked a different middle of nowhere town to scavenge in that day.

They didn't know these people. This could go really well or it could go really, really bad and he wasn't sure which would be worse. Threats they could handle. Threats were expected.

The last group hadn't been a threat though, they'd assimilated quickly and for a while it felt like The Scoobies were back on track. Saving the world, as per usual. It was no coincidence however that not long after their arrival Buffy had shut down the camp to new additions. The gates had a metaphorical padlock on them now and he'd struggled to get the key for a long time. If he was being honest with himself that was why he'd jumped so quickly to lure these people home with them. They were another chance, a way to convince her it wouldn't always turn out how it did before.

Eight months later history was repeating itself. He could only hope that this time, with these people, things would be different. That they'd all learned from their mistakes.

* * *

The driveway was long and winding and Daryl wondered if there was an actual house at the end or if they'd gotten stuck in a loop. The property itself was massive. Acres of three paneled horse fencing lined the edges and weeping willows graced the sides of the gravel drive. This was the sort of place he'd never have stepped foot on before the turn unless it was in a delivery van or while wearing a tool belt. The plantation style home that came into view didn't dispel this theory.

Four teenage girls stood at the wrought iron gates, brandishing pistols and eyeing up the convoy before pushing open the gates to allow them to pass.

"How the hell'd you find this place?" The curiosity was genuine. It was tucked so far back from the road you'd have squint and tilt your head just right to even see the entrance onto the driveway.

"Saved the owner from a pack of wild dogs about a year ago." He saw Daryl raise an eyebrow from the rearview mirror. "No really. Well, not just me it was a group effort but it was only luck that he lived here."

Daryl guessed there was more of a story there but didn't push further. Spotted two women approach their car from the house and the atmosphere went still.

This could be it. The moment when they found out if this was all some sort of terrible trick to eat the flesh off their bones or something else equally awful. Because it wasn't like they hadn't been there before. What was left of the world had turned into a very twisted place.

They all converged in front of the SUV, awaiting their answer to this unasked question. He could feel Carol close behind him and tightened his grip on the crossbow. None of them had drawn their weapons yet but it wouldn't take but a second for someone on either side to break and then it could be a bloodbath. Another Terminus all over again.

Two of the four girls from the gate entrance flanked them as the other two approached from the front. Their demeanor wasn't hostile but their presence left no doubt that no one was taking chances.

The short blonde who introduced herself as Buffy wasn't what he expected when he envisioned their leader, but who the hell was he to judge anyway. Especially these days. The younger one, Dawn, looked exactly like her voice sounded over the radio. Peppy and unworried.

Buffy, however, did not look unworried or peppy. She was a complete opposite to her counterpart with worry lines etched into her face and a tired expression and Daryl frowned slightly at the contrast. Watched as they stopped a few feet away from their group and she began to speak. Her stance was wide, arms crossed, face serious. This was someone used to being in charge and Daryl already wondered how soon it would be before he had to peel Rick off the ceiling over some disagreement between the two of them.

If they even stayed.

"You're…unexpected, but I'm sure Xander has his reasons for inviting you back here and I trust his judgement."

She must have noticed the condition they were in and the wary looks on their faces then because her expression softened and she tried for a half smile that didn't quite reach her eyes.

"You're unexpected but you're not unwelcome. You can stay as long as you like. We don't have much but it's safer here than most. If you stay everyone pulls their weight, that's just how it is. We work together, it's how we survive. If you turn out to be the stabby types that like to gut people in their sleep I'd strongly advise against that, just fair warning."

Rick was pondering this new information. He cast a look at Daryl and got a nod back in return. This seemed ok so far. He didn't get the feeling that they were about to be ambushed or lined up for slaughter. Not yet anyway.

Rick cleared his throat and directed his attention to Buffy. "If we stay we keep our weapons."

"Considering everyone else around you is also armed, that seems reasonable."

That was apparently the tipping point because Rick relaxed just slightly and nodded. "Ok. We'd like to stay."

Buffy smiled a thin line and gestured to Dawn. "This would be your area of expertise. Show everyone around and find them somewhere to set up?"

And with that she was gone and they were left in the hands of Xander, Faith and Dawn. Presumably to get settled in, yet all Daryl could do was marvel at this sudden turn of events.

They had been close to starvation not 24 hours earlier, roaming the woods aimlessly, and now here they were. With a new group that seemed to actually have their shit together, in some small capacity at least. He wondered how quickly it would fall apart again.

"I'm not sure how you all prefer your sleeping arrangements but we don't have a whole lotta room in the main house anymore. There's a pretty big guest house though and a smaller super cute shed type thing that I think the previous owners used as a drawing room or an art studio. I don't know, but it's adorable and could probably fit two of you in there with the rest in the guest house."

Daryl looked over at Carol next to him who was trying to hide a smirk at Dawn's ramblings and descriptions of the sleeping quarters. Like anything being super cute made any sort of difference whatsoever.

In the end they'd been shown both structures and then left alone to make their own decisions about who would go where. Xander called out as he and the other two walked off. "Once you get settled come up to the main house. Vi's making some kind of stew concoction for dinner that could be amazing or …something else. I say we all find out together."

Once they were alone Daryl immediately called dibs his preference.

"I'll take the adorable art shed." His voice was completely deadpan and Carol snorted. Then surprised him by volunteering to stay there with him.

She side eyed him. "What? I like art."

She did like that piece they'd found in Atlanta that looked like a dog wiped it's ass along the canvas. That was all it was. She liked art and he had just acquired an art shed whatever the fuck that was. Naturally she'd want to stay there. It all made perfect sense when he thought of it like that. Then he suddenly realized he was actually thinking about it and abruptly shifted his focus back to the others and their discussion about arrangements.

They split off to their respective spaces, the shed only a few dozen feet away from the main guest house which really was gigantic and easily accessible. Being separated wouldn't be that much of a danger if they could spit and hit their neighbor anyway.

Daryl entered the shed with Carol close behind him and they both stopped abruptly in the doorway. It was small yes, but Dawn's definition of a shed was entirely different than their own. He shook his head a moment and couldn't believe he was having the thought at all, but it really was fucking adorable. Dammit.

The space was open with a small kitchen at the back, cozy living area at the front, and a single bedroom in the corner attached to the bathroom. The floors looked like old barn wood planks and the kitchen cabinets where a soothing teal blue. By the window stood an art easel with a blank canvas and several other paintings on the ground. Some half done with images of birds and horses on them and others totally white.

He chanced a glance at Carol and tried to puzzle out her expression. "Ya'll right?"

She nodded, looking for all the world like she was most certainly not all right.

"Just feels…too good to be true. What if it doesn't work?"

He knew what she meant. What if they thought they'd found sanctuary when in reality they'd walked into a trap. Or worse. These people being legit wouldn't mean an end to the worry, they could be weak, a hinderance, and if they needed to be carried it would only be a strain on his already fragile group. They could barely carry themselves right now.

Still, he couldn't help but be hopeful. Even just a little. They'd spent so long struggling, didn't they deserve a rest? Hadn't they all earned it?

He nodded at her, chewed his lip a moment and then offered the only thing he could think of to say in response.

"What if it does?"


	2. Chapter 2

Daryl wasn't sure he'd ever seen so many women in one place before. It was as if they'd stumbled upon a sorority where the members carried rifles and knives. He'd counted two dozen the previous night when they'd gone up to the main house for dinner. Moving in a steady stream from the front door into the kitchen and back out again with whatever food they'd gotten.

Everyone seemed to have somewhere to be. There were no loiters. No sit down dinners around the large table that was set up as a makeshift buffet, holding a pot of stew that someone named Vi was only too happy to watch everyone try.

He'd been requested to help fix the fencing in a far off field by Xander this morning, which was his current destination when Carol and Rick fell in step on either side of him.

"What do ya think so far?"

He shrugged at Rick as they continue on their path along the outer permitter of the property. "Dunno yet. Made it through one night though and we're all still in one piece."

"Don't think it's the people here we have to worry about." Carol had her arms crossed as she matched pace with him and Rick, a smile that didn't even crinkle her cheeks gracing her face as one of the girls passed them.

"Whatdya mean?"

She shook her head, smile gone now that they were alone again. "I can't put my finger on it. They're too…settled? Too relaxed? I don't know. I heard Dawn and Faith bickering about who got the last of the red vines this morning and Xander was making jokes about fixing windows during the apocalypse."

"Maybe they've just adjusted."

She sighed. "Is there such a thing anymore?"

They stopped at the top of a hill, an eight foot section of broken fence in their sights with two other girls already working on it.

"You think they're walker bait? That it?"

Carol nodded and he let himself think about the interactions he'd had so far with the new group. There was an easy pace here but there was also an undercurrent of conflict between the four people who led this small army of teenaged girls.

He'd noticed how Buffy barely had two words for him or anyone from his group the few times they'd had a chance to interact. When they'd arrived he'd expected the so-called leader to be the one who handled them in most respects, but she'd been delegating that burden to others so far. Xander especially got the job of managing the new additions.

"They got you doing anything yet?" He watched as Carol nodded and pulled her top a little closer.

"I offered to help in the kitchen this morning. Vi and Dawn were all for it, Faith looked like she wanted to say something but didn't. I don't know how they feed all these people, they're bottomless pits from what I saw last night."

Rick piped up from his post at Daryl's other side. "Rest of us haven't been tagged yet. Could be they don't trust us, which is understandable. Could be they need time to…figure us out."

Daryl squinted against the sunlight. "Think it's weird there's only a bunch of women here? Feels like I stepped into a nest of black widows."

Rick tilted his head and nodded his agreement. Carol smirked at him and raised an eyebrow. "Don't worry. I'll protect you."

He scoffed as they all parted ways and he headed for the line of fencing with his name on it. There was something off here, they all felt it but what it was no one could pin point just yet. As he watched the other two woman fixing the fence next to him, lifting lumber with barely a wince and not a complaint to be heard between them he wondered if this new community would end up surprising them all. In one way or another.

* * *

"I thought we talked about this. All of us. We agreed that it wasn't a good idea after…" Buffy trailed off while she and the others cast questioning looks directly at Xander.

They were all gathered around the kitchen island in the main house. Buffy, Xander, Faith and Dawn. Discussing the merits or lack thereof of Xander's decision to bring the new group back to home base.

He sighed. "We did talk about it and I know why that was the plan." He narrowed his focus to Buffy, expression serious. "I know. But It can't be the plan forever."

Buffy crossed her arms, frustration clear on her face. "Why not? You think you did them a favor? You didn't. They're safer out there then they are in here with us."

Faith hopped off the countertop she was perched on, tossing a few peanuts into her mouth before passing the bag to Dawn. "I gotta agree with Xander, B. Look, you know I'm the last one to say we need to be saving everyone, but what the hell are we even doing anymore if we don't try?"

Buffy paused, her voice quiet when she spoke. "How do we make sure the same thing doesn't happen again? Because I can't do that…I can't."

The mood in the room was suddenly somber and all she could hear in the deafening silence were the screams of people they'd tried to save once before. Death coated the walls of this place. Seeped into the pores of every surface and attached to everything it touched. She wondered if she would ever be able to walk into the house again without seeing it play out in her mind like a video on a loop.

They had all been there when it happened. Everyone in this room knew the price that was paid on both sides if something were to go wrong. It hung in the air between them, unspoken.

"We don't tell them. That's how. They can't be afraid of what they don't know."

She regarded Faith. "They have eyeballs, they're gonna see it eventually."

Faith shook her head. "They won't. We tell the girls to go easy on lifting heavy shit. Not to break out the fancy moves unless it's unavoidable. It could work. They won't see it because they're not lookin' for it, B. Who would?"

Buffy sighed and nodded. Maybe she had a point. The average person wouldn't connect the dots if they went out of their way to avoid presenting dots in the first place. That's where they had gone wrong before. They'd gotten comfortable, attached even, to people they thought they could trust with their deepest secret. It was only inevitable that they'd been proven wrong.

* * *

Daryl lowered himself onto the sofa of their new home. The water from the bathroom was running hot enough to send puffs of steam under the closed door where Carol was showering. The entire farm ran on well water and they'd been surprised to find solar panels on the main house and generators for the two smaller spaces.

When they'd discovered last night that hot water was a real thing again he'd half expected Carol to shuck all her clothes right then regardless of the fact that he was standing right behind her. She had been so excited for the briefest moment that her smile was genuine and he couldn't help but smile back in return.

Then she'd shoved him out the door and he didn't see her again until she was freshly scrubbed and clean for the first time in forever. Half an hour after that, enough time to let the tank refill and heat up again, she'd told him to do the same or she was going to hose him down in his sleep.

He didn't need to be told twice.

The happiness at their unexpected good fortune was quickly chased away by nightfall when he'd heard her gasping in bed from his spot on the living room sofa. Nightmares were something they'd all endured at one time or another but they seemed to attach themselves to her like a second skin, rarely giving her a night of uninterrupted sleep.

She'd gotten good at hiding it while they were out on the road but he'd always heard. Always knew. Now that it was just the two of them in this little house it was only too clear that she'd never gotten as good a handle on them as she tried to pretend she did.

Daryl shifted on the sofa as the water cut off and he heard her puttering around in there doing whatever women did in bathrooms for extended periods of time. Wondered if he should try to get her to talk to him. His previous attempts, which were inept at best, had all been shut down with a half smile and a brush off.

He was nothing if not observant though. There was rarely something she did that he didn't notice and it was impossible not to see that something was very wrong here. He just wished he knew what the hell to do about it.

She exited the room as he was pondering that thought, a rush of steam bellowing out behind her. "Give it an hour or so and it's all yours."

He grunted in response and she seated herself at the opposite end of the sofa from him, legs curled under, the same clothes she'd worn before back on again. They still didn't have much yet. Maybe that was something they could change soon.

She caught him eyeing her and tilted her head a fraction of an inch. "What?"

"Nothin." He mentally scolded himself for chickening out. He should ask her again if she was ok. One of these times her answer might be different and he was good at being persistent. In this moment she looked somewhat content though and he didn't want to break the spell. He got a curious look from her in response but she didn't press further. Just settled into the corner of the sofa while he did the same.

He spent the rest of the evening wondering how two people could live together and still seem so far apart.

The next morning the farm was alive with activity and Faith pounded on their door with a heavy fist before yelling at them from the other side. "Yo! Up and at 'em love birds. It's adventure time."


	3. Chapter 3

Carol whipped the contents of the mixing bowl with fast, hard strokes. She was making another batch of blueberry muffins from a box of mix they'd had in the pantry. She'd come into the main house earlier that morning with Daryl and the others only to find out that it was indeed adventure time, as Faith liked to put it.

A few groups were going out for supplies and if she titled her head and squinted just right she could see exactly why. This was a mission designed specifically so they could all get to know each other a bit better.

Buffy had strategically split them up into several smaller clusters. Daryl with Faith, Rick and Michonne with a younger girl she didn't recognize yet, Glenn and Abe with two other women who'd she'd seen at breakfast that morning.

Some stayed behind, which made sense and considering she never expected them to tag her for runs she wasn't exactly disappointed when Vi had ushered her into the kitchen and asked in a rush of words if she could try to make something that resembled snacks from whatever they had left.

That was where she'd been for the last hour. Steadily stirring muffin mix and adding in random items to the batter that she knew would be healthy but blend well into the overall flavor.

Her mind drifted to Daryl and she wondered how his run was going with Faith. Wondered if he was safe, if his new adventure buddy had his back or not. She hadn't spent much time with any of their new acquaintances yet but from what she could see Faith appeared to be competent enough, if somewhat nonchalant about their situation in general.

"Hey, whatcha makin'? Ohhh, muffins."

Carol looked up to see Buffy enter the kitchen and reach over to a tray of already baked muffins to pilfer one off the rack.

"Vi requested snacks, I aim to please." She said with a smile as Buffy proceeded to tear pieces off the still hot muffin.

"You ok? You looked a hundred miles away just then."

She responded without thought, this question was easy. "Fine."

Buffy raised an eyebrow. "Fine, fine? Or fine with capital letters, hand gestures and manic laughter? Because I don't know about you, but option B is pretty tempting these days."

Her mixing stopped and she cut her eyes up to regard the person in front of her who was waiting with open interest for her reply. "I'm…not sure how to answer that."

Buffy nodded. "Understandable."

Carol paused a moment. Tried to shake off that feeling of defensiveness that overtook her when anyone tried to pry even a little bit. Decided to shift attention away from herself and redirect Buffy's focus elsewhere for the time being.

"We all really appreciate you letting us stay here. It couldn't have come at a better time."

Buffy stopped her muffin disassembly. "Xander's the one to thank for that. I was against it, part of me still is to be honest, but I'm choosing to believe that he knows what he's doing. Even if it's hard to see it right now."

"You lead the group, you don't have final say on things like this?"

Buffy huffed out a laugh. "Sure. Mostly. But this isn't a dictatorship. Been there, done that, never works out well. Got the T-shirt and the year's supply of Xanax for my troubles."

Carol pondered this information a moment. Decided she liked the answer and slid another muffin in Buffy's direction after the first one had disappeared completely, then went back to filling up the tray with fresh batter.

"These are amazing."

Carol gave a half smile along with her response. "I used to make them like this for my husband. Found some unopened applesauce in the back of the pantry. It takes the place of butter and keeps the muffins from drying out."

"So I take it the husband is not Mr. tall dark and broody out there in the shed with you?"

"Daryl? No. We're not…like that."

The expression on Buffy's face was a mixture of surprise and disbelief but she didn't voice either of those when she spoke. "Well I'd suggest you lay claim to that one pretty soon because in case you haven't noticed there's a lot of hormones floating around this place. Poor guy won't know what hit him if they start thinking he's fair game."

Carol huffed in mock exasperation. "Laying claim to Daryl would be like trying to herd cats."

"That bad, huh?"

Carol nodded, her expression amused. "Some days even worse."

They both laughed and she remembered all the times she thought she was trying to do just that. Lay claim. A hundred different moments of their days together flashed through her mind. All the times they had touched, flirted, comforted each other and she still had no idea where they stood. Maybe she never knew at all. Maybe it didn't even matter when they all had other things to worry about.

She placed the remaining mix into the oven and shut the door before regarding this person who seemed easier to talk to than most of her group combined. Why was that, she wondered. Maybe it was the allure of conversation between two people that didn't know anything about one another. No one was reading between the lines, deciphering hidden meanings or seeing anything but what the other presented. There was so much history between her core group now. So many regrets. How do you talk about anything normal with people who have killed along side you.

She wondered how long it would be before she felt that way about Buffy too, about everyone else they were surrounded by now.

Her gaze absent-mindedly went to the one place she'd been trying to avoid staring at during their entire talk. A long scar from one side of Buffy's neck, to the middle and a few inches downward. It was as if her throat had been cut but the person holding the knife was stopped midway.

She realized she was staring and quickly corrected herself but had already been caught.

"It's ok, it's hard not to look at it. Trust me, I know. But that's a story for another day."

She was about to respond. Apologize for staring, tell Buffy she didn't expect an explanation, but they were interrupted by the sounds of a car and a loud string of cursing coming from what sounded like Faith. They made their way out to the front porch just in time to witness Daryl dragging her out the car door and hefting half her upper body over his arm as they shuffled toward the house.

She held the door for them as they entered. "What happened?"

"Donkey kicked her into a barb wire fence."

Both Buffy and Carol stopped and stared directly at him, looks of disbelief evident on their faces and he only shrugged before depositing Faith onto one of the chairs at the kitchen table. She was dripping a steady stream of blood from a gash in her right thigh and left a heavy trail in her wake.

"He's not kidding. Fucking donkey came outta nowhere. How's a girl supposed to be prepared for that shit? Zombies I can handle. Donkey's are angry little fuckers."

Faith winced as Carol peeled back the torn fabric from her thigh. "It's pretty deep, you probably need stitches just to be safe. If you have the supplies I can do it for you."

Faith shrugged. "Fine by me. Hurts like a bitch already. Ohh are those muffins?"

Buffy nodded at Carol as she tossed a muffin to Faith. "I'll get the stuff. You sure you know what you're doing?"

"We had a vet with us before, he taught her."

Carol looked up at Daryl from her spot next to Faith at his comment. He'd been proud of her back at the prison when she was learning from Herschel. Useful things like sewing up a wound or setting a broken bone. He'd tried to hide it but he wasn't nearly as good at hiding his thoughts as he liked to think he was.

Buffy seemed to take this information as being good enough and quickly left in search of the items she needed.

Twenty minutes later Faith had a straight line of tiny stitches in her upper thigh, Daryl tried and failed to hide the smallest of smirks at her accomplishment, and Buffy offered her a new job that didn't involve making muffins and had everything to do with using the skills she didn't think she'd be breaking out again any time soon. 


	4. Chapter 4

They'd lost their previous doctor to a walker. That was what Buffy had told her earlier that day as she'd lead Carol into what they set up as a makeshift medical bay.

"Dawn does a lot of whatever we need lately, but she's got the bedside manner and touch of a Mac truck."

"I'm not a doctor. I know a few things but it's all second hand knowledge."

She'd been wary of accepting this offer when Buffy mentioned it. It would only take one mistake, one fumble and if she ended up killing one of their people, even by accident, it could mean exile for her entire group.

Buffy just shrugged as she pulled down various bins and opened random drawers to show her where everything was located.

"I don't care if you found out how to reset a broken finger on youtube. If you can do it, that's good enough. We need the help. We don't tend to get beaten up too much around here but when something does happen we've barely got a few girls who know how to do more than put a bandaid on an open wound."

She paused then, probably noticing for the first time the hesitant look on Carol's face at the prospect of being even partly responsible for the health of the whole community and her expression softened.

"Look, you don't have too. This isn't an order. You just seemed to be…comfortable with handling the situation with Faith. We could absolutely use the extra pair of hands, but if you don't want the job I'll understand." She stopped a second and gave Carol a hopeful look with a small smile. "Also, bonus? It doesn't require presetting an oven. I reserve the right to beg for additional muffins at some point in the distant future though."

She'd relented then with a small nod and got a full blown smile from Buffy in return. It might be nice to do something that actually helped someone. That hadn't been a thing any of them got to do much of anymore and opportunities were slim to non.

Carol had spent the rest of the afternoon getting familiar with the space and the supplies, of which they had surprisingly plenty before heading back to the tiny house she shared with Daryl.

He was already there, stretched out on the sofa like it was Sunday afternoon and they hadn't a care in the world.

"Hey, that sofa try to float away?" Her voice was light when she said it but he bolted upright quicker than she could finish her sentence.

"Was just resting a minute. 'Bout to head out. See if anyone needs anything done."

"Daryl, I'm teasing. We deserve a rest. If they need us they'll say so."

He relaxed some then and she noticed the apprehensive and somewhat shy expression on his face. Wondered what that was all about and if she should try and drag it out of him. Decided she absolutely should.

"What is it?"

"Nothin' just thinking."

She huffed. "How'd your run with Faith go aside from the donkey incident? Did you two manage to get any supplies before she went flying into a fence?"

He nodded and made his way off the sofa to a nondescript paper bag on the kitchen counter.

"That woman is insane and never shuts up, but it was fine. Got a few things before the Ass showed up."

She smirked at his pun. "Look at you making jokes."

He'd grabbed the bag from the kitchen and plopped it down onto an end table in front of her before sitting back on the sofa. "Gotcha something"

Her eyebrows went straight up into her hairline and she curiously peered into the bag to see what he possibly could have gotten her. Pulled out a plain white button down shirt in exactly her size.

"You got me a shirt. Daryl, thank you." It was perhaps one of the most thoughtful things someone had ever gotten her, even if it was pure white and just begging for a stain.

He only shrugged but she could tell there was a small amount of heat running up the back of his neck and he refused to look at her straight on. "Figured we all needed some new things. Saw that and just grabbed it. Might not fit."

"It's perfect." She headed off to the bathroom for a shower that had been on the agenda anyway and emerged half an hour later wearing the newest addition to her merger wardrobe.

* * *

As the sun started lowering itself behind the trees the final two groups that had set out earlier returned in a rush down the gravel drive. It didn't take long to see Rick and the others discussing something that appeared to be urgent with Buffy in front of the main house and before the night was over everyone on the farm had been gathered into the large kitchen.

Buffy and Rick at the front. Carol, Daryl and the rest of their people off to the right with Buffy's group to the left and a smattering of twenty or so women at the back.

Buffy nodded to Rick, a que to fill everyone in on the crisis of the day. "While we were out today we found a quarry. Massive, filled with walkers. Can't even count how many. They're contained for now but that won't hold forever."

The room was silent except for Faith who snorted from her spot on the kitchen table. "Why the hell not."

"We clearly need to come up with a solution to this problem. I'd be all for leaving them there but if there's a chance they could get out…it's not worth the risk."

Buffy was interrupted by Rick who launched into a suggestion that no one else in the room seemed to be impressed with. "I think we should lead 'em away. We can get a few cars up ahead, they'll follow the noise. We take 'em about twenty miles out."

Xander raised a hand and spoke with barely concealed puzzlement. "Or we can try to avoid setting a herd loose into what's left of the free world? Call me crazy but I don't like the idea of sending them on walk about even if it's in the other direction."

Faith nodded and pointed to Buffy. "Let's blow 'em up."

"That could work." Came from Dawn at the far left.

"Kill it with fire." From Xander.

"Ok ok, let's say we do find a way to light up the whole quarry. How do we keep from setting forest fires because I'm pretty sure that would be unadvisable."

Dawn's words were confident when they floated out over the room. "Technically that's not a concern if the quarry is deep enough and the fire is far enough away from the edges. If there's nothing else to feed the flames once the dead are…well dead…then it'll just burn itself out. It would be a relatively controlled burn."

She paused at the people watching her and crossed her arms in Buffy's direction. "What? I know things."

Faith jumped down off the table she'd been perched on. "Little D is on point. I'm down for some zombie roasting. I'll bring the s'mores."

Buffy was silent for a moment, pondering this new information and Carol could see the internal debate all the way across the room. Everything had it's risks. Every decision had the potential to make or break them. She didn't envy the other woman her position. Watched as Buffy regarded Rick and the rest of his people.

"You guys ok with plan B?"

Rick glanced at Daryl who nodded the affirmative. Rick was hesitant to agree, she could see it written there plain as day. He wasn't in favor of the plan but in the end practicality won out and he simply agreed. Picking your battles was never something Rick had been good at but Carol could only hope that this was a sign he was learning.

Buffy nodded and addressed the room. "We'll leave in the morning. Dawn and I will have your assignments by then. Half of us stay here, half of us go. Best case scenario this'll be over by nightfall. Everyone get some sleep for now."

* * *

Xander was giving her a look that she could only describe as satisfied with a hint of amusement and it took everything she had not to flip him off. This didn't mean anything. She was not in any way whatsoever getting attached to any of the new people and the only reason she offered Carol a job patching up wounded slayers was because they were short staffed on people with actual medical skills. That's all it was.

"For someone so worried about them finding out that everyone here except yours truly and Dawn can bench press a car, you sure set them up to witness some pretty nifty super healing."

Xander was seated at a bar stool in the kitchen, sharing a bowl of expired goldfish with Buffy. Everyone else had cleared out to their respective spaces, leaving the two of them to discuss the day's events.

She rolled her eyes. "Come on. Of all the ways they'd be suspicious I don't think one of us healing from a cut or broken bone earlier than most is gonna be the smoking gun."

He held up his hands in mock surrender. "I'm not saying it's a bad idea. In fact I think it's good. They need to feel like we appreciate them. Like they're one of us. That sort of thing takes time but it'll never happen at all if we keep them at arms length. People only start thinking you got something to hide when you're actively hiding something."

She let out a soft laugh. "Thanks for making the rash decision I made on a whim sound like it makes perfect sense."

"It does. I'm glad you made it."

He slid the bowl of goldfish over to her again and she grabbed a few, popping them into her mouth lazily. "What do you think about Rick so far?"

"I think he's used to being the one giving orders. For now, he's dealing, but it might be an issue someday."

She sighed and nodded. "Things could be different when they've settled. When they see it's not a case of us versus them. They've all been out there a long time now. Can't just shake that off overnight."

She had noticed the same thing. Done her best to not completely shut Rick out of the decision making right off the bat to avoid setting up conflict. This one needed a soft touch and that was an effort Buffy wasn't entirely certain she wanted to make forever. The prospect of them butting heads down the road loomed in the background and she could only hope it never became a reality.

By that time tomorrow they'd be celebrating a victory and mourning a loss and Carol's new white shirt would be almost entirely covered in blood.


	5. Chapter 5

Carol was starting to think that Vi had a touch of hypochondriac in her. She'd been to the clinic twice already that day. Once for a migraine and now for a sore lower back. Leaned up against the wall next to the window, hands waving wildly in time with the story she was telling.

"I don't know, sometimes it comes and goes and I think it all goes back to this one time I picked up my sister's kid and he was a fat baby and it threw my back out for like two weeks but then it was fine, except that was a decade ago and now it just randomly happens again for no reason what do you think I should do?"

Carol simply stood there and blinked at the complete run on sentence the other woman spouted at her. She tried and barely succeeded at hiding a small smile. It apparently didn't take long for news to spread that someone was actually in the medical area of the main house on a regular basis and she wondered when she'd be looking at sore throats and hangnails.

"I think there's not much you can do except take it easy and wait for it to pass."

Vi nodded, accepting this advice without question. "Yeah, you're probably right. I mean it's not like it'll last forever. Maybe it's good they didn't send me out today. I really wanted a chance at that rocket launcher though. Dammit."

"I'm sure there will be other chances to set things on fire. Here take this…" She handed Vi a few capsules of Tylenol for good measure. "and rest up for the reminder of the day."

Her outstretched hand holding the medicine barely had time to reach it's destination before her eyes cut to the window. One of the other girls was walking the perimeter of a paddock about twenty feet from the house. Rifle slung over her shoulder, eyes squinting into the sunlight, an easy but purposeful stride to her gait. She didn't see it coming when someone snuck up behind her and slid a long blade directly into her back. Moments later she fell to the ground. Soundless, motionless, gone.

Vi must have noticed her pause. Seen her stare out the window and take in the scene in front of her because she swiveled around and looked too. Gaze going wide and a firm grip dragging Carol a few steps out of view in one swift motion.

Her voice was serious when she spoke. All trace of back problems or headaches forgotten. "Stay here. Shoot anyone who comes in that isn't one of us."

And then she was gone. Leaving Carol alone in the clinic still clutching the pills in her hand. She most definitely was not staying there. That much was certain. There was only ten of them left on the farm that day, the rest having gone earlier to handle the situation at the quarry.

She had no idea how many enemies were roaming their property but the idea of leaving it up to chance and hiding in the clinic while the remaining girls faced it alone was never an option. She slide out the back door, keeping close to the walls of the building and passed over the bodies of two of their attackers on her way. A third rounded the corner the same time she did and she didn't hesitant to stab him directly in the neck, then once in the head to make sure he didn't get back up.

The first spray of blood coated her hands and slid down her wrists over the sleeves of her white shirt. He fell like a rock and she left him there without a second thought. The captial W etched into his forehead barely registering as something to remember before she left.

Four more bodies greeted her on her route to the larger guest house. Whoever was attacking them seemed to be having a hard time of it. They'd barely made it onto the grounds at all before swiftly being taken out.

Carol made her way to the back of the house and came face first with the sight of someone pointing a gun at Vi. Her own gun was out and firing a bullet into his head before she could process more than the thought required to pull the trigger.

Vi huffed out a relieved sigh. "I thought I told you to sta…"

She didn't get to finished her sentence before another shot rang out and her blood sprayed in an arc across Carol's chest.

Any shock at what had just happened was overtaken by instinct and she fired the last bullet in her gun, taking down the man who'd shown up behind Vi.

The sound of gunfire was consistent in the space beyond her, ringing out in waves and then stopping entirely. She chanced a look around the corner and saw the rest of the girls standing over what was left of their attackers littered across the front drive.

How quickly things could change in an instant, she thought. There really was no where safe anymore. They were only kidding themselves if they'd thought otherwise.

* * *

It had taken the better part of a day to make sure the majority of walkers went directly into the fires they'd set at various points around the quarry. There hadn't been much effort required. Walkers were simple creatures and the light from a blaze had lured them in easily enough.

Keeping watch over the fires themselves was another story and they'd left a small handful of people at the site to make sure they burnt themselves out instead of climbing the walls and licking over the edges.

Daryl rode in a truck next to Faith who was driving him and two others back home. She was on some sort of high from the day's events, going on about shit he wasn't even paying attention too.

"Did you see that explosion? Holy shit. Now I can check using a rocket launcher off my bucket list. Wonder if we'll get to use it again someday." She paused and side eyed him with a sly expression. "Bet you'll steal that fucker right outta my hands next time, huh? Saw you eyein' it. Don't worry, man. I can share my toys."

He snorted. "Nah. That's all you. Have at it."

"I can't figure you out sometimes, dude. You don't wanna blow shit up, you got a cute little side piece in that shack with you and you ain't hitting that, you don't seem to wanna hit this either." She gestured to herself. "What DO you like? What gets you off? Come on…share your feelings. This is a judgement free zone."

He was glaring at her now but she only laughed and he shook his head in response. This woman was like a thorn in his side. She'd spent the vast majority of their first outing together talking his ear off about her walker kills and prying into every avenue of his life, including but not limited too his relationship, or lack there of, with Carol.

There were no limits to what came out of Faith's mouth. Her only saving grace was that she seemed to treat everyone the same way and didn't single him out. He supposed some people just couldn't help themselves when it came to lack of boundaries.

In some ways, if he was being honest, it was a welcome change to spend time with people that spoke real words to each other on a regular basis, regardless of how tactless those words were. He was sorely out of practice with social skills, if he ever had any to begin with, and his group never gave him much reason to hone them.

"Fine. Opt out of this arm chair therapy session. But someday I'm gonna get more than one sentence out of you. I have my ways."

"We'll see 'bout that."

As they made their way down the gravel drive he had a sudden realization that it was entirely too quiet on the farm. Even with half the people left there for the day it was bustling with activity and the girls were often anything but quiet.

The view of the main house and the carnage that lay at it's feet only confirmed his suspicions. He felt as if the wind had been knocked out of him.

They were just here. They'd just left. How had this happened already.

Daryl didn't wait for the truck to come to a complete stop before jumping out and asking the first person he saw where Carol was. He only got a confused "Don't know" in response from a woman who's name he'd forgotten and ran to the first place he thought to look.

The clinic was just as empty as the rest of the main house and he was almost frantic by the time he'd reach the shed. Having to step around and over at least a dozen bodies on the trip there.

He stopped in his tracks when he saw her, bloodied and quiet on the single porch step. Felt his stomach drop and his feet move of their own volition in a sudden rush to reach her.

"You ok? You hurt?"

She didn't respond and he knelt in front of her to check for injuries. There was so much blood. It coated her hands and arms, speckled across the front of her chest and dripped down her collarbone.

His hands ghosted over her. Tilting her head from one side to the other, pulling her shirt slightly sideways to check for bites or cuts at her shoulders, pushing her sleeves up a few inches and even going so far as to inch up the bottom edges of the fabric to check her stomach for any source of blood.

"Hey, look at me. You get bit? Are you hurt?"

Carol's eyes cut to him and she shook her head. "It's not my blood."

They stared at each other for the span of a heartbeat before he let out a rush of breath. He was relieved even if it felt like a completely inappropriate reaction considering the situation.

"Vi's gone. She was telling me her whole life story just an hour ago and now she's gone."

He sighed. Let go of her arm that he'd been clutching and sat next to her on the step as she continued.

"I shot the man who shot her. Stabbed someone else. The other girls ended the rest of it before it really began. Couldn't have taken more than ten minutes? Fifteen?"

She wasn't really talking to him as much as she was talking at him. Her voice distant and unaffected. He needed to find a way to change that before she slipped away entirely again.

"You did what you had too."

She nodded. "Yeah."

"You did. Don't question it. Start doing that and there ain't no end to the what ifs. For any of us."

She didn't respond, just stared out over the paddock in front of the shed and he nudged her leg slightly with his knee. Held out a hand palm up and waited.

She looked at it for what felt like a lifetime but he was too far in to give up now and so he stayed still. Heart thumping in his chest from the adrenaline at thinking she'd been hurt. Face creased with worry after finding that she was, but not in the way he'd first thought.

Eventually, she reached out a trembling hand and took his own, lacing their fingers together as they sat quietly in front of what was quickly becoming their home.


	6. Chapter 6

A day later, everyone had been gathered at what passed for a cemetery at the edge of the property. They'd burned the bodies of their would-be attackers but Vi and Juliette were laid to rest a few hundred yards beyond the furthest paddock. In two freshly dug graves that paralleled an older one.

It was almost too fitting a place for such a thing, Buffy thought, as the trees drooped around them and tall grass shifted in the breeze. Almost peaceful.

That notion was shattered by the sounds of sniffling coming from one of the girls at the back of the group, next to Carol and Rick and the others from the new additions. Buffy braced herself, remembered why she was here in the first place and began to speak.

"I know what happened yesterday has been hard on everyone. We lost two of our own…and we took over a dozen lives. It should be hard."

She paused, looking far more confident than anyone had a right to be while giving a speech to people who'd just been wallowing in death.

"It should be painful. When it stops being those things is when we stop being who we are and turn into something else." Her voice softened then before she continued. "I know that some of you may be doubting what you've done, but I won't have anyone questioning their actions. You kept each other alive and that's what matters."

The faces looking back at her were dismal, disbelieving, and she understood why. The deaths of Vi and Juliette were a hard blow, but it wasn't only that. The vast majority of those who were gathered in an arc around her had a destiny that literally told them to save people.

To save the world, no less.

If the occupation of being a Slayer had a snazzy brochure it would be written on the front page. She had used it in her welcome speeches to new recruits back when they had a functioning school. Had believed it once herself. Even had it etched into her own tombstone a million years ago.

But now. Now they'd been forced to abandon those ideals in favor of surviving another day. Her heart ached for a time when killing monsters and averting a prophecy was the hardest thing they had to accomplished. How could she make anyone feel less horrified about the fact that they'd all become killers when she was still horrified by it herself.

It was in her job description though, even if the words felt hallow in her mouth she would say them. She would try.

"Vi, Juliette, Willow. They'd want us to keep going. To not let this or anything else make us forget that we still have a purpose here. Now more than ever."

She had wrapped it up with a neat little bow about taking a day to mourn and then getting right back out there and moving on, but she'd be damned if she didn't doubt every word.

How did you move on from something like this. It had been eight months since they lost Willow and she still thought of her every day, still replayed the images of that night in her mind every time she set foot into the main house. Played out a thousand different scenerios in which the outcome could have been different.

Still fought back the guilt that overtook her at what she'd done after. What they'd all done.

For the hundredth time since the world had begun trying to end itself she cursed the powers that be and wished she could hold her liquor. She could really go for a drink right about now.

* * *

Carol was running. Faster than her legs should have been able to carry her. Winding through the woods, weaving in and out of trees and brush, only slowing a moment to glance behind her and see the herd of walkers left in her wake.

They were moving just as fast. Closing the distance with a rapid pace and it occurred to her for a moment that this was all wrong. How were they so close? She'd run for miles now, they should be far behind but they only kept coming. Terror jolted through her at the idea of being caught. There were so many now, all blending into each other until she couldn't tell one from the next.

A few faces stood out though. Ones belonging to people she used to know. Who'd been unfortunate enough to cross paths with her and they stared back as they closed in, their proximity pushing her to a ledge that somehow made perfect sense.

She could jump. The space below her was wide and open and while she couldn't see the bottom she knew jumping was a solid option. It would be ok to just step over the edge and drift down.

She could stay. If she rooted to that spot they would overtake her without question. This should have been an easy choice, she thought. Jump. Of course jump. It was the only logical thing but her feet wouldn't move and indecision cost her the chance to choose.

The dead descended on her in waves and she screamed.

"Carol! Wake up, you're dreamin' "

She felt strong hands shaking her shoulders and her eyes flew open, unseeing and vacant and she struggled with a muffled gasp. Still half trapped in the scene that played out in her head she didn't register the voice just yet but could feel the hands trying to hold her down and flailed even harder.

They didn't let go though, only pulled her in tighter and just when she thought it was finally the end, that this was how she was going to go Daryl's words broke though the haze and she stilled.

"It's just me, you're safe. You're all right. Just a nightmare."

Her breaths came out in a cluster of tremors and she clung to him without putting any conscious thought into the action. Wrapping her fingers into his shirt and clawing at his sides. He had her pressed completely against him, no doubt to try and stop her from hurting herself while she was fighting off unseen attackers but he didn't move to let her go. Just clutched her tighter while she wound herself around him.

"I had a dream."

The words were small and quiet and the fact that she was stating the obvious was completely lost on her.

She felt the rumble in his throat before he spoke. "I noticed."

One hand ran the length of her back in a solid but gentle repetition and she felt herself relax against him just slightly. It must have been bad this time. Nightmares were a frequent occurrence but he'd never woken her up prior to tonight. Not even since they'd been living in this place alone together.

Carol suspected the noise kept him awake but he never mentioned it in the morning and she didn't bring it up. How loud had she been that he would push past all the lines they'd drawn for each other, all his own personal boundaries, to drag her out of her own mind and against himself?

She should move. The thought hit her like a freight train and almost caused her to back away but the intent halted before it even began. Maybe it was okay to let this happen. Be selfish just this once.

Still caught in the fog of sleep a decision was made that likely would have been different in the light of day, but here in the dark with traces of a nightmare still fresh in her mind the last thing she wanted was to be alone.

His hand stilled over the back of her neck, thumb rubbing soft circles there and she was done for. Powerless to resist. The feeling of his heart thumping rhythmically against her own chest was the last thing she felt before her eyes slid closed again and she drifted off.

* * *

Carol woke the next morning tucked back into her own bed. Alone. That had been a week ago. A day after the massacre and the unexpected funeral that cued up a nightmare strong enough to tear her resolve to shreds.

She made every effort possible to avoid Daryl since then. He had seemed unfazed by the night's events when she saw him later that day, but she was shaken to her core.

In her unfiltered terror she'd let him get too close. Let him see just how much she was unraveling and accepted comfort that hadn't been earned. The only obvious option now was to put more distance between each other, which was hard to do with you lived with someone.

She had been spending the vast majority of her time in the main house now, either baking un-asked for muffins and cookies or doing something valid in the medical area when the need arose.

If he noticed he didn't let on and the fact that he didn't push made her feel like this was the right choice.

Someone else had apparently noticed all too easily though.

"I'm not one to complain about all the yummy goodness coming out of this kitchen lately, but mind if I ask why we have enough cookies to feed a small army?"

Buffy perched on a bar stool on the other side of the counter and eyed Carol while taking a cookie off a high pile.

"Just figured we could use up some of the stuff that's been burning hole in the back of the pantry. Lots of things can blend well and you don't even taste them. "

"Uh huh. I recognize stress baking when I see it."

She stopped her mixing and gave Buffy a level stare. "I don't know what you mean."

"So it has nothing to do with the fact that you've been avoiding your house mate all week?"

She sighed. "How..?"

Buffy just smirked. "Faith. Apparently Daryl has been doing more sulking than usual and Faith was able to drag out something that resembled an explaination from him when they went on that run yesterday, though I'm still not sure how she did it. I'm actually a little afraid to ask."

Carol didn't respond. Just tossed down the mixing spoon and braced her forearms on the counter top. Defeated. He had noticed after all, not that she'd been so deluded to think he hadn't. The familiar weight of guilt pulled at her. He'd been there when she needed him the most and in return she was keeping him at arm's length.

"Hey, I'm not trying to pry. I'm the last person that should be giving relationship advice. To anyone. Ever. My own track record looks like it came out of a bad horror movie. But…there's always a but...maybe talking to him wouldn't be a bad idea?"

"I don't know how."

"Did he do something? Do we need to kick his ass? Because we've got that covered over here, just say the word. Tarred and feathered, maybe even hogtied?"

Carol actually laughed at the thought of Daryl doing anything to her that required an ass kicking as revenge and apparently that was the goal because Buffy had a knowing look on her face as she laughed too. "Yeah, I didn't think so. So what gives? I clearly fail at not prying, I'm just gonna stop fighting it."

The usual urge to brush off her worries as nothing was overwhelmed by the need to talk to someone and she blurted out the words in a rush. They tasted bitter on her tongue and she immediately regretted letting them loose.

"I had a nightmare and he woke me up. Then he held me until I fell asleep again and I let it happen."

Buffy's face turned to mock outrage. "That asshole. I see now why he deserves the cold shoulder."

Carol shook her head. "Sounds ridiculous when you say it like that."

Buffy just shrugged. "I call 'em like I see 'em. Talk to the guy? He's taking this harder than he wants you to know. I'll accept my payment for this impromptu shrink session in cookie form, please."

She scooped up several cookies off the tray and hopped off the bar stool before pausing. "Oh, there was something else I came in here for. We're having a group meeting tonight. Bring your plus one and get ready to brainstorm on how to loot an entire Home Depot without losing any limbs in the process."

Carol's head shot up abruptly at the sudden change of subject, the casual way it was delivered and the prospect of them trying to take a place that was no doubt entirely overrun. "What? Wait, why?"

"All topics of discussion on the agenda. Be there or be square."

And then she was gone, leaving Carol alone in the kitchen to wonder what sort of danger they'd be getting themselves into next.


	7. Chapter 7

They needed things. Plain and simple.

The large store that loomed in front of them had those things and then some. Daryl knew it made sense but he couldn't shake the feeling that this was a bad idea.

Buffy and Faith seemed to think that clearing a Home Depot wouldn't be nearly as difficult as it sounded, and at first he believed them. The promise of lumber for better fencing, additional solar panels, water filtration for the well, tankless water heaters and other things that only used to be possible before the turn was enough to make the entire group surge forward with the plan as if it were fool proof.

Then they'd arrived and all his reservations came back full force. It was entirely overrun with walkers. There was no way they'd be clearing this mess without ending up on the dinner menu.

They were littered across the parking lot, stumbling around the enclosed garden area and he was certain just as many roamed the aisles of the building. Yeah, they needed shit, but they also needed to be alive to use it.

He glanced around himself at the others who'd been assigned this mission. Glenn, Rosita, seven of the women from the farm and Faith. It seemed like a significant number when they left.

Now it paled in comparison to the hordes that waited ahead.

"There's too many, won't make it ten feet in."

Faith snorted next to him. "Oh ye of little faith. See what I did there?"

He ignored her pun and watched her direct the others on the most logical route to clear the area. Couldn't believe they were still going ahead with it, but he had to hand it to her, she seemed to know what the hell she was talking about as she mapped out the strategy.

He was to hang back and put a bolt through anything that snuck up on them. Faith and four of the others would take the lead, Glenn and Rosita in the middle and the remaining people at the back.

"Stay together if you can, try not to split up." She leveled a stare at the women from her own group and continued. "Keep it to head shots and decapitations, people. I start seeing anything that's not reasonable and we're gonna have a problem."

He had no idea what that even meant but there wasn't time to question her before they were dispersing. Leaving him a few steps behind while they surged forward.

If he had any doubts about their potential success what he was watching now washed them away faster than one of his arrows through a walker skull.

They moved across the lot like a swarm of loctus. The walkers barely had time to notice they were being hunted until it was too late, and that's exactly what this was. A hunt. Glenn and Rosita held their own admirably but the others were fixated on the task at hand like lions after a herd of very slow gazelle and he'd be damned if he didn't spot a full out smile on Faith's face as she slashed through two walkers at once. A few strays got a little close for comfort a time or two and he'd dispatched them quickly, but half his quiver was still full by the time the lot was clear. Couldn't have taken more than fifteen minutes tops.

"Who the fuck are these people." He muttered to himself before jogging up to the others at the front of the building.

Clearing the inside had been just as easy despite there being a walker at every turn and he was suddenly brimming with questions that he had no idea how to voice.

Daryl remembered when they took the prison. How they'd stayed in formation and somehow managed to survive, but it was never in question how dangerous the challenge was and it had remained a challenge until the last walker was down.

This on the other hand, started out a challenge and quickly morphed into something else. Had to be a logical explanation, he thought. Maybe they had just adjusted exceptionally well to this life. Maybe they'd been in the military. Maybe they were all insane and suicidal.

Something was off. He just couldn't put his finger on what.

Less than half an hour from when they started Daryl was pushing a rolling cart to the lumber area with Faith and a few others hot on his heels. They would start there, with the most needed items and work their way through the rest of the store after they'd loaded up as much wood as they could haul.

"Looks like there's a party on aisle twelve. Wanna grab a few things for you and the Mrs, Dixon?"

He glanced up at the signs that listed what each lane carried and just shook his head in frustration at Faith. It was going to be one of those days. She could never just mind her damn business and leave him be. Her voice floated over to him again as if to confirm that thought.

"Chains and rope too hardcore? You more of a feathers and candlelight sort of guy? I can respect that."

She was loading lumber into the cart next to him and he lost his internal battle to ignore her entirely. "Stop."

If he thought that would back her off he was wrong because she only snickered. "I'm just trying to do my civic duty as your friend and help you get laid, ok. It's my job and I take it seriously."

He paused just slightly in his actions at her statement. She thought they were friends.

Rick was a friend. Glenn too. Probably everyone from his group if he was being technical. Carol was absolutely a friend even if that seemed far too light a word to describe her.

Talking about anything other than plans and strategies and how to fucking survive hadn't been on the agenda for him in a long time though. Was this how friends behaved when they didn't have a hundred kills shared between them? If he had to compare Faith to anyone, personality wise at least, his brother was a more fitting option. Teasing him about banging Carol while she was tied up with chains from the Home Depot was right up Merle's alley. He snorted at the mental image of his brother on this run with them, going toe to toe with Faith in all the outrageous things they would say to him.

"Why we talking 'bout this?"

She shrugged. "What else are we gonna talk about? You and the housewife are the closest thing to another episode of reality tv I'll ever see again."

"My life isn't a reality show."

"Did you even talk to her yet? It's been a week. You've been extra dark and broody lately and while some women, not naming names…Buffy….find that endearing I'm not one of them."

He didn't respond and she let out a dramatic sigh. "I'm gonna tie you both together with something from this store until you either fight it out or fuck it out. Don't test me, Dixon."

"Can't just talk to her. She's going through some shit. Don't need me pressing her about it."

Faith hefted the last board onto the cart and grabbed three more for good measure to carry over her shoulder as they left for the truck. "We're all going through some shit. It's sort of par for the course. Who the fuck else is gonna press her about it?"

"Ain't that simple."

"Ain't that complicated either. Go back there and show her you give a shit. Either by straight up saying so, or just grab her and throw her up against a wall and…"

She made a grunting noise to punctuate the last sentence and he stared open mouthed at her.

"There's somethin' wrong with you."

"I've been telling her that for years." Came a disembodied voice from inside the store.

She raised an eyebrow at him. "Unless the field where you grow your fucks is now barren. In which case don't do anything."

He looked away. She had him there. "The field ain't barren. Can we just get our shit and go? Don't you need one of them tankless water things you've been going on about?"

Her face lit up at his comment, like she had entirely forgotten about the object of her desire until then. "Oh my god, I do need that! They better have a bunch of those because I'm not above fighting all of you for one."

She was heading into the store, intent on finding the plumbing aisle before she turned and started backing away from him, her expression innocent. "Unless…you and Carol could use one? I hear it's great for shower sex. Unlimited hot water right at your fingertips. Just sayin' "

He scowled. "Jesus Christ."

* * *

It had barely taken a few hours to loot the store and bring back everything they needed. Home improvement items seemed to be the last thing on everyone's list at the end of the world because it had all been there, just waiting to be plucked off the shelves and driven back.

Daryl slid out of the truck and headed for the medical area. Had no idea what he was gonna say to Carol when he got there, but Faith was right. He had to stop avoiding the situation. Stop letting her avoid him.

He rounded the corner and pushed open the door and starred in slack-jawed shock at the sight of one of the girls dripping blood from her shoulder and onto the floor. The unmistakable outline of a walker bite glaring back at him.

Carol was patching up the wound, a tired and wary expression on her face when she saw him. The girl looked more irritated than anything and his confusion level sky rocketed.

Buffy crossed her arms and fixed him with a hard look. It made him want to back all the way up and out the door and he barely caught himself before doing just that.

"We need to talk."


	8. Chapter 8

Of all the ways she suspected someone might find out, a bite from a stray zombie on one of the girls was not in her cluster of mental worries. Especially not when the person in question had barely left the farm.

Lured by the sound of a small animal crying, Sharon had wandered off the property by a mere dozen feet and straight into a tiny herd who had cornered a rabbit. She took out three of them before the fourth sunk it's teeth into her shoulder blade and got a machete to the head for it's efforts.

Buffy knew it would happen eventually. She'd tried to kid herself into thinking they'd be able to keep their biggest secret from the new additions but in the back of her mind she always knew. Something would tip them off. Either obvious as a bite or subtle as someone throwing their strength around just a little too hard.

A bite however, was harder to hide, especially when Carol had been within seeing distance of Sharon cursing a blue streak and dripping blood all over the foyer of the main house. Then Daryl had shown up shortly after and she half expected everyone else to follow suit and just walk in single file like they'd gotten a memo.

Buffy's mind spun with options for damage control. News would spread like wildfire if she let it.

She would have to tell them. Well, she would have to tell them something. Lies were easier to swallow when they were coated in truth.

Daryl was staring at her like he expected a power point presentation of what the hell was happening as Carol finished tending to the wound. She hadn't had time to come up with anything to tell Carol before he'd burst in the door so at least she wouldn't have to spin this twice. Took a deep breath and did her best to sound calm.

"We're immune."

Blunt and to the point. Like ripping off a band aid. Figured it was easier than beating around the bush. Daryl stared at her in open disbelief. Carol's brow creased and she side eyed her before speaking.

"Define immune."

Buffy sighed and turned away from them. Lifted the back of her shirt to reveal two walker bites that had long since scarred over on her lower back.

The room was silent. If she listened hard enough she was certain she could hear her own heartbeat having an epileptic fit in her chest. This was the moment. They would either accept this explanation as fact and not question it, or they would never stop questioning it.

Would either agree to keep it to themselves or tell everyone they knew.

Buffy hoped she hadn't made the wrong choice in allowing them in. In more ways than one.

Carol spoke first, her voice barely a whisper. "All of you? How?"

"All of us except Xander and Dawn. We just are."

"You could be a cure. Whatever's floatin' around in your blood keeping the virus in check. Could be a way to.."

She didn't let Daryl finish before she cut in. She'd heard it before. Hoped it herself a long time ago. "It doesn't exactly work like that. We've tried. It's…a part of us in a way that can't be transferred. I'm sorry."

"Well this is good news, right? Means Sharon is going to be ok?"

Buffy couldn't help but smile back at the genuine smile Carol was giving her. Then remembered she had one last thing to hit them with.

"I'm going to ask that you both keep this to yourselves. That you don't tell anyone else from your group. I know it's a lot, I know that's the first thing you'd wanna do because if the situation were reversed it's the first thing I'd wanna do…but there's a reason we don't lead with this info when we meet people."

"Never?"

Buffy regarded Daryl. "I'm not saying never. When the time is right, if the time is right, I'll tell them myself but it's not your secret to share. I'd appreciate the choice to tell it if and when I choose."

She paused and ran a hand over her face in exhaustion and huffed out a sarcastic laugh. "Or… one of us will get bitten again tomorrow in full view of everyone and then it won't be an issue because at the rate we're going, luck is not exactly on our side."

She saw them both look at each other for a few brief moments. Witnessed an entire conversation happening without a single word and then Carol was nodding at her with just a trace of sympathy.

"We won't tell anyone. I'm just happy you're going to be fine." She regarded Sharon and then looked back at Buffy. "You can trust us."

And that was how half their secret was told to one fourth of their new friends. Not exactly how Buffy would have planned it but it certainly could have gone worse. Had gone worse.

* * *

A few minutes later she'd sent them both back home to the shed. Sent Sharon upstairs to her room with strict orders not to scratch the bite as it was healing and rifled through the kitchen cabinets for a stash of chocolate she'd hidden a few weeks ago. For nights when she felt like the powers that be were fucking her over extra hard. Tonight was one of those nights.

Her mind played through the last time she'd told someone new the truth. The whole truth. Her blood ran cold at the memory.

It had been an ordinary day by all accounts. Willow was seated directly across from her on one of the bar stools eating from a bag of red vines and scrying for live people on a map.

That was their mission at the start. Find people. Help them. It was what they did and they were damn good at it. Picking up slayers along the way didn't hurt matters either.

They'd found a dozen people in an army supply store not long after their searches began. They'd assimilated surprisingly well considering the situation and Buffy felt like maybe she really did still have a purpose here in this world that was slowly eating itself alive.

It didn't take long for her to stop considering them separate groups and start thinking of everyone as a single entity. Invited them on runs, shared the daily responsibilities that never ended on the farm, traded puns with them.

Roughly six months after she'd first allowed anyone who wasn't a slayer entry to the farm, someone got bit.

Buffy had been careful up until then. Making sure all traces of magic or slayer skills were glossed over and well hidden. She trusted these people, yes, but it was a lot to take in for anyone that'd spent their life thinking these things weren't real. That monsters were only in fables and super powers only happened in comic books.

But then someone got bit and she couldn't just sit by and watch them die. That wasn't what they did, after all. So she gave Willow the go ahead to heal him in full view of the others. Would never forget the shock and awe on their faces when they witnessed it.

The gratitude they'd given her and Willow afterward.

The ambush she'd walked into that night after the sun crept down and she entered the front door of the main house and saw Willow dead on the tile only a few feet away. Magic was no match for a bullet no one saw coming.

Someone move up behind her and placed a knife at her own throat, pressing just slightly but not cutting. She didn't react just yet, could only stand there and stare at her friend while a voice hissed next to her ear.

"Witches! You did this. You're the reason the dead walk the earth."

She felt the blade slice into her flesh and blood drip down her collarbone. Saw Xander, Faith and Dawn approaching from the opposite direction, coming from where she wasn't sure, but it didn't matter now. The haze of shock broke and her elbow shot out to catch the man square in the eye.

He fell like a rock and that's when she noticed they were all there. Everyone they had welcomed into their home with open arms. Everyone they offered sanctuary to when they needed it the most.

All there to slaughter them where they stood on the false belief that they'd caused this apocalypse.

Her vision swam with unshed tears and she locked eyes with Faith for a split second. Decision made. Blind rage overtook her and then she was shoving the sharp end of her knife through the skull of the closest person she could reach.

Then the next.

And the next.

They had come to see a slaughter and they'd gotten their wish, they just didn't expect to be the ones on the receiving end. Between her and the others they'd blown through the entire group in under sixty seconds, leaving nothing but carnage at their feet.

It was the first time she'd ever taken a human life but it wouldn't be the last. She had to protect the girls. Had to make sure no one got a second chance to put a bullet through them.

The gates to the farm hadn't opened to another outsider since. Searches for live people stopped. If they saw someone they went the other way.

Until now. Until this new group that Buffy had already felt herself get far too attached to. Tried hard as she could to be indifferent because when she told Xander he made the wrong choice, that they were safer out there then they were in here with them she hadn't been exaggerating.

She took in a muffled sob as she relived the memories of that night and could only hope that this time it would be different. That this time their new friends wouldn't turn on them when they least expected it.

* * *

Daryl and Carol sat side by side on the living room sofa of the small house they shared. Forearms resting on their knees, complete mirror images of each other right down to the conflicted looks that graced their faces.

"What do ya think about this?"

She spread her hands a moment as if trying to search for an answer and then dropped them just as quickly. "I don't know. It's a good thing? I think?"

He nodded, chewing his bottom lip in an effort to channel the sudden influx of stress. This day started out being weird as fuck and it had only gotten worse since then. He wasn't even sure how to rationalize any of it just yet.

"Feel ok about not tellin' Rick and the others?"

Carol sighed. "No. I don't feel ok about it. I want to tell them. I feel obligated to tell them. But…" She gave him a confused look before continuing. "I also feel a strange sense of loyalty to Buffy and I understand why she doesn't want everyone knowing."

He nodded again. He knew what she meant. Felt the same way and it was a relief to know she did too. That it wasn't just him allowing himself to become completely entangled in life with these people. To feel a sense of loyalty to them that he couldn't even categorize in his own mind.

"Far as secrets go it's harmless. Right?"

He regarded her question and agreed. "Yeah. We ain't keepin' shit from them that could end up hurtin' them. Knowing wouldn't change anything anyway."

He saw her relax some then, run a hand through her short hair and sigh and was reminded of his conversation with Faith earlier. How he'd been so adamant about coming back here and 'showing her he gave a shit'. He had a completely unplanned goal of getting her to talk to him earlier that day, and now it felt like the wrong time, wrong place, wrong everything.

When would there ever be a right time, he thought.

"You ahh…you ok? Been gone a lot, it's quiet as shit in here without you."

Well that was great. One sentence in and he was already cursing at her and making no sense. His leg tapped in a hurried rhythm and he chanced a look in her direction to find blue eyes staring right back at him. A small pout on her lips for good measure.

"I have been gone a lot. I shouldn't have done that. I'm sorry."

"Ain't gotta apologize. Didn't do anything wrong."

She was giving him a sad smile now and he was certain he'd legitimately fucked this all up. She was already looking like she wanted to cry.

"No. I did. I've been avoiding you and you don't deserve that."

"Why you been doin' it then?"

She huffed out a completely unexpected laugh that sounded hallow to his ears. "Because it's the opposite of what I actually want."

He felt the corner of his mouth turn up just slightly. "You know that doesn't make any sense, right?"

She nodded. "So I've been told."

"I won't wake you up again. If you want me to leave you be. If you need more space."

He was rambling now and couldn't stop. She had to know he wasn't going to push her too hard. Would leave her alone and keep his distance every time she woke up screaming from a nightmare if it meant she'd start coming home when he was there too.

He felt her fingers on his face, brushing the hair out of his eyes and thankfully his mouth finally stopped forming words. For someone who barely held a conversation without consistent effort he was on a roll there.

Her voice was soft and sad when she spoke to him. "I want less space. That's what scares me."

She wanted less space. He wasn't sure what that meant entirely but it was a hell of a lot better than what he'd expected her to say, which was to back off and stop trying to make her talk. Less space he could do. Somehow.

He didn't have time to over think it though because seconds later her hand left his hair just as quickly as it had come and she curled her legs up onto the sofa next to him and pressed herself into his side.

He froze for a moment, arms held as far away from her as he could reach, unsure of where or how to touch her when she was plastered against him, but she only settled in further and his arms quickly wrapped themselves around her of their own accord.

"I'll start coming home more."

Her voice wafted up to him and he rested his chin on the top of her head. "Good."


	9. Chapter 9

They were having a party. Or what resembled a party when over half the population of the world was dead and you weren't sure if you'd actually live to see tomorrow. Oddly enough, they were doing a decent job of it too.

Daryl was packed into the patio of the main house along with everyone else on the farm. The patio doors were wide open, music was playing low enough to be heard but not loud enough to waft off the property, various foods thrown together from whatever they had on hand covered the dining table and someone had even strung up tiny little twinkle lights.

He scowled just slightly. Fucking twinkle lights.

They'd gotten the news of this impending party from Xander the night before. He'd been adamant that they all needed it, that everyone was wound too tight and what was the point of anything if you couldn't occasionally kick back with a bottle of beer and pretend shit wasn't falling apart on the regular.

Truthfully, he'd had him at beer. Daryl would be lying if he didn't admit, to himself at least, that this sad excuse for a party wasn't actually half bad. In fact, it was the most relaxed he'd been in a long time, which was saying something since the thought of mingling or doing whatever the hell people did at legit parties was way out of his comfort zone. But this wasn't like that. He wasn't required to participate and no one pressed him for small talk, but they included him non the less and that alone made him want to try.

The genuine smile gracing Carol's face also made him want to try. She was talking to Dawn, Buffy, Maggie and several of the other women who's names he'd already accepted he was never going to remember and she looked happier in that moment than she had in a long time. Since the prison, at least.

Dawn held Judith, bouncing the baby on her hip and gushing over her. He could faintly make out their conversations from his spot across the patio where Xander was talking to him and a few others about fencing and the benefits of cedar versus pine wood and other shit he was only half paying attention too.

Dawn's voice hit his ears as he took a pull on his beer and he watched the scene unfold.

"How is she just about the cutest thing I've ever seen in the history of ever?"

Buffy was tickling Judith's cheeks while rolling her eyes at Dawn at the same time. "Down girl. Don't get any ideas. These are cute but they're also seven different types of hard to care for. Remember that egg baby you had in high school? Barely lasted a week."

"Hey now, that wasn't even my fault. There were extenuating circumstances."

"It fell down the garbage disposal."

Dawn scoffed. "That was a circumstance!"

Judith took that moment to become fascinated with Dawn's hair, twisting and turning it in her chubby fingers and letting out a high pitched squeal for good measure and the entire cluster of women laughed.

"Anyway, I'm pretty sure I'd have to be carrying the second coming to have a baby right now, so you have nothing to worry about. I'll have to settle for snuggling this one when I can."

He'd lost track of the conversation then, voices tangling together one over the other as the whole of the group chatted amongst themselves in smaller little pods. He was also starting to feel like an expert level creeper for eavesdropping and especially for staring, which he was certain he'd be doing. His ears may have been listening to Dawn, but his eyes were watching Carol.

Xander clinking a spoon against a beer bottle jolted him out of his thoughts and his eyes away from her just in time.

"A toast…to it being Tuesday and Dawn's still here."

"Ha ha. Very funny." Dawn's reply was amused and she responded with one of her own. "To it being two weeks without a donkey incident."

Faith huffed. "Those fuckers are no joke. To drinking our weight in expired beer."

"To finding the one CD in this house that wasn't by Vanilla Ice."

Buffy's last comment got a chorus of laughs and everyone tipped their respective drinks.

His eyes roamed again, back to their original target only this time she caught him. Tilted her head just slightly and rewarded him with a small smile that crinkled her eyes. He couldn't help the side of his mouth from quirking up in response or his head from ducking a fraction of an inch.

The timer on the oven broke the moment and then Dawn was shoving the baby back into Carol's arms and running into the kitchen to retrieve whatever was about to be burnt to a crisp.

He spied her moving toward him then, baby in tow and barely had a moment to react before she was giving Judith to him. "We're playing pass the baby and I'm pretty sure it's long past your turn."

He didn't hesistate to prop her up on one arm and she cooed at him in a sort of amazed delight that only babies could harness. "Ass Kicker's been making the rounds, huh?"

"Oh yes, she's turning into quite the social butterfly."

"I'm surprised her feet even touch the ground anymore with these girls here, every time I see her she's bein' fawned over. Gonna make her head too big. Won't be able to fit through the door no more."

Carol shook her head at him, leaning against the patio table and nursing her own drink, a soft look on her face that he'd pay money to keep there permanently.

"It's good for her. She's been so isolated, she needs a little socialization. To meet new people. Make new friends. That's important for babies."

"You got a point there. She likes it too. Dontcha, Asskicker?"

The baby just laughed, the sound coming directly from her stomach as if he'd said the funniest thing in the world. They both followed suit, though their own laughs were far more reserved, if not just as content.

He'd thought this party a waste of time when they brought it up.

Why bother using resources for something as frivolous as standing around and talking about nothing. As he watched Glenn and Rosita laugh at a story Faith was telling, her hands waving wildly in the air as she spoke, watched Rick, Abe and Sasha have a full fledged conversation with Xander and several of the girls about cheese of all things and how they might get lucky enough to find a goat someday, watched Buffy and Dawn slice out pieces of what looked like cobbler from the kitchen, he could see now why it was anything but frivolous and exactly what they all needed.

He'd be damned if he wasn't learning to like it here. Was feeling like this could be the start of something that had once seemed so impossible. A life beyond just surviving.

Carol caught his eye as this revelation hit him and it was clear she knew. Could see it on his face as he swayed with the baby, his eyes watching her in return.

"Yeah. Me too." Her words were unprompted. Lazy and soft and coated in at least one full adult beverage and he decided he liked the sound.

Later, after everyone started wandering off to their respective spaces, after the food was cleared away, music turned off and twinkle lights taken down, they headed back to the shed for the night.

He'd been careful about not drinking too much. His tolerance was low after going without for so long and it wouldn't do anyone any favors to be caught drunk if trouble hit. That's not to say he didn't have a few. So when Carol looped her arm through his on the long walk back liquid courage boosted him just enough that it felt completely natural.

Her two beers must have done the same for her. Little as she was that was likely enough to be feeling pretty good right about now.

As they entered the house she made a comment about passing out until next year and he realized every word she spoke, every move she made went straight through his ears and directly south. The alcohol was doing a good job of un-filtering his thought process and unlocking his inhibitions and all he wanted right then was to keep her there with him instead of leaving for her own bedroom.

She seemed to be having a similar problem because she lingered a moment, hand dragging down his arm as she finally walked away with a parting 'good night'. Took everything he had not to trail after her and knock over every wall they'd both put up brick by brick.

Instead, he fell onto the sofa and stared at the ceiling for what felt like hours.

For the first time in weeks Carol slept soundly through the night and Daryl was the one wide awake.


	10. Chapter 10

It was a sunny Monday morning when he strolled up to the wrought iron gates with raised hands, looking like he'd stepped straight out of an REI catalog. Brandishing poorly taken photos of another place and getting a full line up of slayers to block the entrance for his efforts.

It was rare for anyone to approach the farm out of the blue. Set back far off the road and with a driveway you'd have to squint to see, it wasn't exactly screaming for attention from passers by.

Which was why walk-ins were met with immediate distrust. You had to know it was there to find it at all and this man certainly knew it was there.

Buffy approached the gates warily, Faith and Dawn hot on her heels as the red sea of over ten slayers parted. He was far too clean for her liking. Far too put together and well dressed. People didn't wander the world like that anymore, even here on the farm with running water and food and enough deodorant to last them years they weren't exactly strutting around like they'd just gotten a spread in Southern Charm magazine.

This guy though, this guy was clearly from somewhere and she had every intention of finding out not only where, but how and why he'd tracked them down. Her patience and tolerance for newcomers had grown since the latest additions but she was far from ready to make their home open to the public.

She paused at the gate before pushing it open with both hands and walking forward to meet him. He looked innocent enough, but looks could be deceiving. She knew that all too well.

"Who are you and why are you here?"

"My name is Aaron, I've been following you." He stopped a moment and shook his head. "No, that sounds wrong, I have been following you, but only because I think we can help each other."

She was perplexed. There was no chance that he'd have followed her or one of the girls and not been spotted. Regardless of his stealth level they would have seen him a mile away. She made a mental note to press him about this further later.

"How?"

He held out the photos to her and she reluctantly took them. Fingered through the grainy black and whites with rapt interest. "This is where you live?"

He nodded. "Alexandria. It's safe there, we have walls, food, a community."

Buffy handed the photos back to him and crossed her arms over her chest. "And you're telling me this why?"

"Because like I said, I've been following you. Well, not you per say but people from this farm. I'm a sort of recruiter for Alexandria. I look for people that could…fit…could be a part of what we're building there."

"And you think that's us."

He nodded again and she sighed. Could feel the eyes on the back of her head from the girls and everyone else who had gathered on the other side of the gates. She couldn't very well just turn him away now. Real or not, this community he was raving about was information they needed to verify and he was someone who needed to be vetted since he'd so easily stumbled his way into their very discreet path.

"We have a lot to talk about then."

* * *

She didn't feel comfortable letting him into the main house. Rational or not, having a stranger see the inside of their home, what they had or didn't have, allowing him to judge accordingly or catalog what was worth trying to steal wasn't on Buffy's agenda.

So five minutes later they were gathered around the front of the property in a large circle with the newcomer in the middle. If he was nervous about all the sudden attention or the amount of people that lived there he didn't show it. She noted his brief surprise when just under two dozen women showed up, then Daryl, Rick and everyone else they'd brought with them as well.

He recovered quickly though and gave his spiel, touted the benefits of his community and was waiting with bated breath for her response to the offer.

Come see for yourself, he'd said. Come see and then decide.

She had to curb the instinct to huff out a sarcastic laugh at the idea of her and all her girls packing up and moving to this new place. The odds were higher of the powers themselves floating down to earth and reversing the virus on everyone bitten.

They had already built something here. Already put blood, sweat and tears into what the farm was becoming and that wasn't even taking into account the biggest reason of all. The one she could never tell him.

No, she would not be moving house to Alexandria, but she sure did feel like finding out everything she could about this new place that held all these new people. And most importantly, how he'd found them.

"You say you've been following us. Who? Specifically."

Aaron looked around the large group for a moment, eyes roaming over each of the girls. Over Carol, Daryl and Maggie, and finally resting on Rick and Abe. "Mostly them."

He gestured to Michonne, Rosita and Tara as well. "And sometimes them."

Well that made sense, she thought. No one was a prisoner here. They could come and go as they pleased and some of them had done just that. A faint relief washed over her at not having to stomach the thought of a slayer being followed for days or weeks on end without their knowledge. That would have required some serious retraining on stealth management and perhaps even a solid scolding.

Rick had the decency to look surprised. "We didn't see him. I would have said something."

Buffy believed him. They may not always agree but he wasn't actively trying to sabotage them. "I know. It's ok."

She turned her attention back to Aaron. "We'll come with you. Just to see for ourselves."

He looked relieved and somewhat excited at her response. This one, obviously, was harmless. She only hoped the others were too. They could do with forming outside alliances. There could be benefits there and she wasn't short sighted enough to discount it outright. They would go and get a feel for the place and it's people and then form a plan on how to move forward.

* * *

Twenty four hours later Carol was sitting in the larger guest house with everyone from her core group. They had just gotten back from Alexandria and her mind was spinning.

Aaron hadn't been lying when he said they had all the modern amenities you could ask for as well as an actual community that seemed to be thriving thus far.

It was beautiful.

It was also cold and sterile and unfamiliar. Everything the farm wasn't.

Rick had spent the last few minutes discussing the benefits of leaving for this other place permanently. It was presented as a choice, an open invitation from the people of Alexandria to everyone here.

Join us. Become one of us. Help us flourish and we'll help you in return.

Buffy was adamant about not going once they'd returned earlier that day, saying that there was potential for trading amongst the groups but anything beyond that was more than she was comfortable with.

Carol had never really expected that she would accept the offer. If there was one thing she knew, it was that Buffy was a leader and her plans didn't revolve around supporting another person's dreams of a better life. She had her own goals and also her own secrets to keep. Things that didn't mesh with this new option.

"I think this could be a chance for us to be a part of something bigger. Something safer, more stable."

Rick's voice wafted over to her and she saw the others pondering his words. Saw them slowly start to come around to his way of thinking and she couldn't stop herself from speaking up.

"What about what have now? Here. I know it hasn't been that long but…it feels right here. I can't be the only one who thinks so."

A few of the others were nodding in agreement.

"What Buffy's given us is something we can't ever repay, but there's more out there. We know that now. If we're gonna build a life, we need to focus our efforts where there's the greatest potential. They have resources that we don't now. A doctor, higher walls, watchtowers, enough ammo and artillery to last us a long time. We'd fair better there on the off chance of an attack."

"Maybe we don't have to decide right now. He said it was an open invitation."

Maggie's voice raised above the others and Rick shook his head. "We can't simmer on this. They could change their minds. Decide it's not worth the risk, decide we don't want it enough. I think we need to go and we need to do it soon. This is how we grow. This is how we stop reacting and start living."

And just like that it seemed it was decided. He had a way of making anything sound like it was the best idea in the world regardless of how many holes were in the plan and everyone bought it hook line and sinker. Heads were nodding, expressions were resolute but saddened, and while she could tell more than a few didn't want to go, they weren't about to voluntarily vote against Rick.

Buffy may have become their primary decision maker, but Rick had never lost the status of leader in their eyes and loyalties ran deep.

Carol sighed. That much she could understand. It was hard not to value a bond forged in blood, in the span of years, over one only newly minted.

The group dispersed then, making plans to leave for Alexandria in the next few days and to inform Buffy of their decision in the morning.

Daryl's eye caught hers as she followed him back to the shed. "You ok with this?"

She shrugged. "Don't know. Have to be, I guess."

He chewed his lip absently mindedly and she raised a brow at him. "You?"

"Can't let Rick go there alone. We don't know them yet."

She pressed harder. "That's not what I asked. Are you ok with this?"

He deflated then, returning her earlier shrug with one of his own. "Gotta be."

* * *

She woke with a start. This nightmare had been the most chilling she'd had in a long while. The pieces were fuzzy, images slowly loosing their resolution as the fog of sleep lifted, but the feelings remained. Sadness, loneliness. She'd lost something important and no matter how hard she tried she couldn't get it back. That much she remembered clear as day.

The tears were still hot on her cheeks as she rubbed away the last stray and rolled off the bed. It felt like she was mourning something, and while her dream hadn't been clear as to what, her reality was.

Today was the day they'd be telling Buffy that they'd chosen to leave.

The sun was barely rising as she puttered into the kitchen to fix a cup of tea. Daryl was still stretched out on the sofa and she paused a moment to stare greedily at him while he was totally unaware.

His hair was more mussed than usual, which was a feat in itself. One leg thrown off the side and an arm over the back of the sofa. The position looked just about as uncomfortable as it could possibly be and she wished he'd taken her up on her offer to share the bed back when they first moved in. And every time since then.

They were adults and they'd certainly spent more nights than she could count sleeping in close quarters already, but he refused every time. Saying he was a terrible sleeper and would only keep her awake with his tossing and turning.

If she had known then what she knew now, she'd have insisted anyway. Forced him into her bed and gotten at least one full night of sleeping close enough to him to let his presence soothe her. She'd have been even more greedy than she was right now as her eyes raked over his face, committing it to memory.

Her dream hadn't been wrong. She would be mourning something soon but it would be of her own doing.

Alexandria wasn't more than an hour's ride away but it may as well have been a life time's worth of distance because he would be there and she wouldn't.

She hadn't told him yet. Only made the decision herself a few short hours ago. The overwhelming urge to beg him to stay with her paled in comparison to his responsibilities to their group as a whole.

They needed him more than she did. She would be ok. She would survive here, thrive even.

For the first time in a long while, Carol felt like she had a purpose. Felt like she belonged and it was all wrapped up in this place. She couldn't leave it now. Hadn't felt like that with the people she'd come here with, except for him, since the prison. Doubted she ever would again if she went with them to Alexandria.

Daryl might try to convince her to change her mind, but in the end he would accept her choice and they would go their separate ways.

He would be fine.

She would be fine.

The clenching in her chest that wrapped around her heart like a vice told her otherwise, but she ignored it with practiced ease. The hardest choices were sometimes the best ones. She just had to get through today, had to get through actually watching him leave and then it would be ok.

He mumbled something in his sleep and her face crumbled as she turned away. She was being ridiculous, she thought as she dunked a tea bag into the cup of hot water. It was barely an hour away. She would see him again.

Why then did it feel like she was about to break up with someone she wasn't even in a relationship with in the first place.


	11. Chapter 11

"So that's it? You just decided you're gonna stay and we ain't gonna talk about it?"

She wasn't going with them.

She told him no less than zero point nine seconds ago and after staring at her like she'd grown seven heads his shock had morphed into anger. He paced the tiny space, boots creaking the wood floor beneath his feet as he counted steps from the kitchen to the living room. Trying to calm down. Trying not to completely loose his shit because she had to be insane if she thought he'd just say this was no big deal and drive off without her.

Carol was standing in the middle of the room, her eyes following him as he walked the open area between spaces. "I don't know what else there is to say."

Daryl stopped pacing a moment, his face perplexed, hand raised with a pointed finger as if he were about to drop an important piece of information on her but a moment passed and he just shook his head and restarted wearing a rut into the floor boards.

"You don't? You ain't got a clue why I'm having trouble with this?"

Her mouth opened but no sound came out, as if she were searching for the right words and failing. Resignation at not being able to grasp them just yet fell over her face as she finally spoke.

"I have a chance for a fresh start here. I need that, Daryl. I need it so badly that I'm willing to do this incredibly hard thing."

He tried to process what she was saying through the anger that washed over him in waves. He knew she'd been struggling, saw it plain as day no matter how well she thought she'd been hiding it but cutting ties completely wasn't the answer. Couldn't be the answer.

She'd tried that once and he'd stopped her. Now she was trying again and he had no idea how to change the outcome this time. The terrifying thought of this actually becoming reality halted him in his tracks only a few feet from her, his own mind betraying him and conjuring up all he reasons why she thought she should stay and they all lead back to him not being good enough to make her go.

Old habits died hard and self doubt was at the top of that list, breaking free occasionally from box he'd been trying to stuff it into all his life. He took a deep breath, attempted to focus instead on what she was saying and not what he was interpreting.

If she'd thought she'd found sanctuary here, in all the ways that mattered, who was he to tell her it was wrong. Still, the urge to make her reconsider was strong and he was weaker than he'd like to admit.

"You could have that fresh start with us."

"That's just it. I can't."

"You could have it with me."

There it was. Cards on the table. Heart on his sleeve. As blunt as he was capable of being when it came to talking about anything other than surface feelings. These six words he'd just spoken may as well have been an entire book with the effort they took.

She stared at him, head tilted just slightly and he was convinced all the air had been sucked out of the room and he might not survive the moment in-between his own words and her reply. She was considering it, but the thought didn't last and she turned from hopeful to resigned in the span of a few short moments.

"I can't expect you to stay. They need you. You have responsibilities, loyalties, people who care about you. It wouldn't be fair of me to even think it."

"You're making choices for me. What about what I want? "

She was shaking her head at him now and he knew the conversation had reached a stalemate. He'd had her for a moment and now she was adding bricks to the wall again faster than he could even reach for them.

Her voice was quiet, barely a whisper above the sound of his own heartbeat in his ears. "There's a hundred and one reasons why you need to go. You belong with them and I belong here. Don't make this harder, please."

They stood a mere foot away from each other in this tiny space that barely held enough room for the two of them at once, yet the distance was palpable as they locked eyes. He deflated, his shoulders sagging against the weight of the moment. Gave a short nod and left the room without looking back.

* * *

"You see this shit coming?" Faith was performing the completely unnecessary task of moving lumber from one side of the barn they'd stored it in to the other. Hefting up several boards at a time and just barely resisting the need to toss them down.

She was angry. Xander watched her work from his spot against the barn door. Not daring to get too close for fear of getting a board to the head by accident.

"Can't say that I did."

"What the fuck are they thinking?" She hefted several more across the space as her voice rose an octave.

"That they found something better? That they'd be safer there?"

She laughed. Letting the wood fall from her grasp into the new pile. Her arms opened wide in an attempt to encompass the entire farm in her next statement.

"They live with a bunch of slayers! They've never been safer. What the actual fuck?"

She was right of course. If there was anywhere safe anymore it was here with roughly two dozen super powered women at your side. But they didn't know that. He could hardly blame them for seeing walls fifteen feet high and assuming option B was a better choice.

"Do they know they live with hot chicks with super powers? Because we may have left that detail out of the brochure."

Faith glared at him as she grabbed the last board. "Stop tryin' to be rational. This is bullshit and you know it."

"Yeah, it is. But it's their bullshit stupid choice to make and we can't force them to stay here. It'll also, and I hate to bring this up, but I will…it'll also relieve the burden of Buffy having to tell the others about your immunity, or at some point the whole shebang."

She was perched on the pile now, one leg stretched out in front of her and the other bent on a board as she regarded him. "Fine. That part makes sense. I just…" She clenched her fists a moment in barely contained annoyance. "I want to tell them. I feel like if they knew they'd realize the error of their fucking ways. Those people in that Stepford compound are gonna get everyone killed. You saw it. You know I'm right."

"I did and you are. But we can't just tell them, that's not how this works. We've done what we can for them, Faith. Now we need to set them free and hope they come back."

She squinted at him. "Did you just throw a remixed quote at me?"

"Maybe. Did it work?"

She smirked. "Maybe, but when we have to ride to the rescue and save all their asses from the next big bad don't think I won't be saying I told you so."

"I'd be disappointed if you didn't. Anyway, Carol said she's staying. That's something, right?"

"Yeah. Except Dixon is being top level stupid about leaving."

"Wanna lock him in the basement of the house until everyone's gone? For his own good?"

She huffed out a single laugh. "Don't tempt me. They need more help than any couple I've ever met. In another world I'd be asking Red to do a love spell on them."

He smiled. "She would too. Got pretty good at doing those without any negative fallout, remember the first one? With the guy who turned into that giant toad because it wasn't true love?"

Faith snorted at him. "He was ribbiting all over the Council building for like two weeks before she could figure out how to turn him back. We were about to weld together a fucking cage for him before she got that shit straightened out."

They were both laughing then. Good memories weren't a hard thing to come by, they had stockpiles a mile high and the days of them being too hard to voice were long past but the reality of their current situation settled back in fast and the air suddenly was somber again.

"Let this play out. See what happens. Could be ok."

She nodded and pushed off the pile of boards to follow him out of the barn. "I hope you're right."


	12. Chapter 12

He was leaving.

Had already packed up what meager belongings he had left and was about to disappear down the gravel drive along with everyone else she'd become so close to over the last few years.

But she had told him to go, hadn't she? He'd offered to stay, in his own roundabout way. Willing to shack up in the shed with her until who knows when, no questions asked and she'd still told him to go.

Wasn't surprised when he agreed. Daryl had never been one to push and if she pushed back just a little bit he would give. She'd known that going into the conversation and used it against him for his own good.

He couldn't stay here with her, hold up on this farm like the world wasn't ending. He was needed out there. His presence could mean the difference between life and death for any one of them and she'd not be that selfish to hoard him all to herself.

Carol was helping everyone load up the various cars and trucks they were taking with them, having already said her goodbyes to the others. There was nothing left to do than to watch them go.

Except she hadn't said goodbye to him. Not yet.

Daryl had spent the entire day away from the shed. Away from her. Taking a page from her own playbook and doing any random task that floated his way just to keep a reasonable distance and avoid conversation.

She tried not to let it hurt but it crawled up her chest and twisted around her lungs anytime she entertained the thought of him leaving without another word spoken between them.

She had hurt him too, after all. Even if it was for the best.

"Glad you're staying. Not just because you make a mean snickerdoodle either."

Xander had walked up next to her, smiling and putting a hand around her shoulders as they watched everyone putter around the cars. A small group of the girls, as well as Xander and Buffy had come to see them off.

Carol hadn't spent much time with him since they arrived but what she did see, she instantly liked.

He had an easy way about him, relaxed and kind and the right words fell from his lips more often than not.

"I'm glad too." She returned his smile the best she could though it didn't even threaten to reach her eyes.

"You know, we may be able to secure a little vacation house down there. Go visit on weekends and holidays. Pack up the fam with a couple of picnic baskets and see the sights."

She smirked at him, an eyebrow raised as she took in his ridiculous suggestion. "Vacation house, huh?"

"Seems legit to me."

She just shook her head. He always had some sort of joke to lighten the mood and while she normally let them float right past her, today she was grateful for it. Today was a day when she needed all the levity she could get.

He squeezed her shoulder a moment before letting his hand drop, his face going serious. "You'll see them again. This isn't goodbye, it's just…see you later."

A stray tear threatened to spill over from the corner of one eye and she looked away from him. Nodded her head in the affirmative instead of taking on the monumental task of responding with actual words.

It was then that she saw Daryl heading for the row of cars with his pack and few other things clutched in his hands. Loaded them up into a shiny new Ford next to Rick before leaning his head through the window.

Most of the other cars had already left, the dust kicking up as they slowly peeled away. Rick and Abe had stayed back for Daryl, waiting patiently in the car as he wandered up to where she stood at the front of the house.

Xander had disappeared just as quickly as he'd materialized next to her and suddenly it was just the two of them standing several feet away from each other, struggling for what to say.

Daryl scuffed the toe of his boot into the dirt, eyes downcast, his entire frame telling her he'd rather be anywhere else than attempting to find an acceptable way to say goodbye.

She decided to make it easy on him. It was the least she could do. "Stay safe, ok?"

All he had to do now was nod back and leave. It was a ritual they'd perfected a while ago.

Stay safe. You too. Going, going, gone.

Except he didn't respond just yet. Only lifted his eyes to hers and searched them, for what she wasn't sure but she held his stare. Waiting for him to make a move one way or the other.

"You sure about this?"

His voice was strained and he looked at her with just a smidgen of hope, like maybe this time she'd change her mind and follow him into the waiting car.

Maybe this time she'd tell him to stay.

But she only nodded back and his shoulders deflated, a look of resignation passing over him as he stepped forward quickly and wrapped her in a fierce hug that couldn't have lasted more than four seconds tops.

She barely had time to process what was happening or to hug him back before he was gone, sliding into the passenger seat of the car with Rick without a backwards glance. Taking no less than half of her heart with him.

* * *

Buffy stood in the middle of a grassy paddock instructing a few of the girls on different hand to hand techniques. They didn't need much help, of course. It was in their genes. In their blood, even, to know what to do and when to do it but it had been a hard day and she wanted nothing more than to concentrate on anything other than what took place earlier.

She needed something that required no conscious thought and fighting was a good start.

A little extra practice never hurt anyone anyway.

A small crowd had gathered, presumably for the same reason. To focus on something mundane. She pondered how odd it was that combat was mundane to them, even before the turn.

She was in the middle of correcting someone's form when Faith wandered into her line of sight. Her expression was irritated, body tense and Buffy knew instantly why she'd come.

"Class dismissed. B and I need to work out a little stress. Stay and watch or get the fuck out."

The students dispersed quickly, a few wandering out of sight while most stayed and joined the crowd that had already formed at the paddock fence.

"I see what you're doing but I don't wanna fight."

Faith scoffed. "I do. I'm angry and irritated and a little sparring goes a long way toward getting my brain right again. Don't tell me you don't wanna beat the shit outta someone or something."

She did. That was the thing. She absolutely did want to beat someone or something senseless but while violence coursed through her veins on a regular basis, she had never been one to use it to push back her own feelings. That was clearly Faith's area of expertise.

Still, far as rage therapy went sparring with Faith was the safest bet she'd get offered today and the temptation was too great to ignore.

"Come on, B. I'll go easy on you."

Faith's wide smile was the breaking point and Buffy rolled her eyes. "Fine, but no broken bones on either side, we gotta be able to kill zombies after this."

The other woman nodded her agreement right before she let out a fast right hook that Buffy cleanly dodged. The game was on in a split second and they traded blows and kicks on instinct alone.

They didn't start out slow or easy, this wasn't a class between teacher and student, it was a match between masters and they went from zero to sixty in two seconds flat. Buffy would be lying if she didn't admit to finding it exhilarating and intoxicating and everything she didn't realize she needed.

The rush of being able to fight and not hold back was a welcome thing as she and Faith tumbled and fought their way across the paddock.

She landed a particularly solid kick to Faith's midsection, sending her flying back several feet and into the tall grass. Offered to help her up only to get her own legs kicked out from under her and her hands pinned above her head. Returned the gesture with a flip and pinned her opponent down in the same position.

"Feel better yet? I sure am. Nothing like giving you a beat down to make me smile for weeks."

Faith's taunt spurred her on. "Which one of us is pinned to the ground here…"

Buffy didn't get to finish her sentence before she was thrown off and to the side. They traded blows for several more minutes before finally reaching a stalemate, both women huffing out loud breathes, chests heaving with the struggle. The genuine smile on Faith's face was impossible to ignore and Buffy didn't fight the urge to return it.

"Fine. I feel better, ok."

Faith nodded. "Good. Thought you might." She paused a moment, her expression turning thoughtful as she wiped at a few stray cuts on her forearms. "They're idiots. Don't give it another thought. You do and I'll have to kick your ass again."

Buffy huffed. "Noted."

"Hey, where's Carol? I think this one on my leg needs fucking stitches. Jesus, B. Thanks for that."

"Oh, now you're complaining? Nice. Real nice, Faith. I lost enough blood from this forehead wound to donate to the Red Cross. Tone it down over there."

Buffy's attention was drawn away from the current conversation and to an unexpected voice that broke in from the crowd.

"Carol's right here and she would be happy to stitch up the many wounds you just inflicted on each other."

Well then.

She had quite possibly fucked things up even more with their little display of super powered fighting skills in full view of the uninitiated, but try as she might, Buffy couldn't bring herself to care. Just traded glances with Faith and sighed out a breath that was both resigned and filled with possibility.

There was no sense in hiding anymore. Didn't think she had it in her to even attempt it. Didn't think it would be fair to the woman who'd at most proven her loyalty and at the least her acceptance to them in the most obvious way she could only several hours prior.

"Lead the way."


	13. Chapter 13

She'd spent a decent amount of time patching up both Buffy and Faith after their tousle and was paid for her efforts in explanations she didn't ask for.

They said it like it was nothing. Like it didn't sound entirely ridiculous. Like they weren't surprised at her disbelief and had expected questions, of which she had many on the tip of her tongue.

Wariness, uncertainty, and a sudden concern that she'd placed her bets on the wrong horse worried at her mind.

Maybe this horse was delusional. Maybe it was one step away from needing a straight jacket and enough Xanax to drug it into a stupor.

They seemed to expect this though, from years of forced explanations to the uninitiated perhaps, because when the disbelieving expression on her face didn't fade Buffy left the room and returned with a crowbar. Bent it in half and tied it in a knot without breaking a sweat.

There wasn't much you could argue with after seeing that.

It was shocking at first but then again, what wasn't anymore? Didn't the dead walk the earth already? Of all the impossible things she'd seen, this was at the top of the list but the days of it being entirely unreasonable were long past them and so the urge to lay five hundred questions on them faded and she only nodded.

"Well, ok then. You sure you even need these stitches?"

Faith shrugged. "Technically no, but the deep ones'll scar something awful if they aren't closed up. I got enough of those."

"I thought you said scars bring all the boys to the yard."

Buffy's comment sent a snort through Faith. "You see any boys here? Our yard is filled with other women. No one left to impressed unless you count Xander and I already hooked that one."

"I'll be sure to tell him you said so."

Faith hopped off the table, shrugging back on her jacket and making for the door. "You better. We could all kick the bucket tomorrow, might take him for another ride soon."

"You're the actual worst…"

Buffy's comment trailed after Faith but she was already gone, leaving Carol to look quizzically at her as if she were trying to see right through her skin. Caught herself and made an effort to look away.

"Sorry."

"It's ok. It's a lot. I know we make light of it but it's been our lives for a long time now. For you, it's brand new."

She was about to respond but Buffy continued before she could begin.

"I want you to know you're safe here. We wouldn't…we would never use this against you, or anyone from your group. You're part of this screwed up little family now. I hope that knowing this…that it doesn't make you regret staying."

Carol pondered this a moment. She hadn't been thinking anything of the sort. The idea of Buffy and the girls turning on her was something she couldn't fathom. She did feel safe here, even in spite of this new information. Maybe even more so because of it. When the vast majority of people left alive were probably trying to kill you what better place to be than surrounded by friends who could turn crowbars into pretzels.

She wondered though why Buffy felt the need to reassure her in such an obvious way. Was tempted to ask. To poke and pry and see if she'd reveal the real reason but decided it wouldn't be fair. She had already shared so much.

"I don't regret it and I'm glad you told me." She paused a moment, a smirk playing on her lips. "Next time I need a jar opened I'll stop sliding it over to Xander and give it to one of you instead."

The amusement that graced Buffy's face was genuine. "He really got a kick out of that. I swear he smiled for hours after you gave him that pickle jar."

"He got it open too! Wouldn't pop even after I hit the lid on the floor ten times. My hero."

"Too far. Too far. Don't let him hear you say that, we'll never get the grin off his face."

Carol huffed a laughed and stepped back, leaning her full weight against the window and regarding Buffy in a more serious manner. "This isn't the first time something like this" She gestured around her, trying to encompass the whole of their lives now. "Has happened is it?"

She wasn't entirely sure what she was even asking. Clearly the earth hadn't been overrun by walkers before, but there had been something in Buffy, in the others, that she noticed early on. Could never quite put her finger on what it was but now she thought she had it pegged.

Remembered back to when she first arrived and assumed they were weak because everyone was so relaxed and unconcerned. Saw annoyed acceptance in them at what life had become and thought them unprepared or foolish.

Now, she saw those same traits better explained by experience instead of naivety. They'd done this before in some form or another.

Buffy shook her head, her own expression sober again. "Nope. We're up to apocalypse twelve now. If we count the one where we all almost ended up in a Hell of the shrimp variety. This one seems to be sticking a lot harder than the others though. I'll give it that."

Twelve times the world almost ended. What was she supposed to do with that information? How could she even reconcile it with what she herself knew to be true.

"And it's always just been you? Stopping it?"

Buffy considered this a moment, a thoughtful look on her face. "It's never been just me. At one point I was the only slayer, which is a long story in itself, but I've never really had to do this alone. If you'd asked me that years ago I'd have said yes, that it was me against the world and the others were a much loved burden that I needed to keep saving, but looking back now…I'd have been long dead without them, even before any of this started."

Carol nodded, accepting the answer and added another question without even fully thinking it through. "How do you keep going when it seems so hopeless? Wow, that's depressing, forget I ever asked that." She waved off her last question but Buffy only managed a sad half smile and responded anyway.

"I'd be lying if I said I didn't still ask myself that on a semi regular basis. But, I guess…you just do. There's only one other option and I'm not in any hurry to end up in some strange version of Shrimp Hell." She hopped down from the table she'd been perched on. "Anyway, we still have work to do, right? If we didn't we'd all be dust by now."

The conversation seemed to come to a natural end and Buffy left her in the medical bay with instructions to take a few days off unless someone lost a limb in the near future. That she needed it. That it had been a tough day.

And it had. First the mass exodus earlier and now this, all rolled up into the same twenty fours and she felt like all she wanted to do was sleep away the stress of it but knew the moment her head hit the pillow she'd be wide awake again. Not with thoughts of super powered women and multi part apocalypses, but with thoughts of him.

She had done the right thing, knew it in her heart but that didn't change the fact that she already missed him and it had barely been a full day. Already wished she could go after him and drag him back.

Especially now that she knew the horse she'd bet on was the clear winner. They all would have been safer here even with everything Alexandria offered. Carol had seen the people there and while sweet and kind they reeked of being sheltered and should a threat persist they'd be woefully unprepared.

They all should have stayed. He should have stayed.

* * *

It had been six days since he arrived in Alexandria and Daryl was already coming out of his own skin with restlessness. This place was every suburban nightmare he'd expected it would be and then some. Not that he didn't appreciate the way things had settled. He did. It was safe as it appeared, at least for now, and while the people were less than capable there was a lot of them and they were welcoming.

He'd spent spaghetti Tuesday with Aaron and his partner, slopping up the noodles like he hadn't eaten in a week even though he was far from starved. Avoided the welcome party like the plague now that he didn't have anyone to put all his energy into not gazing at, no easy camaraderie with the others to fall back on while they discussed random things like cheese and carpentry and who the fuck found twinkle lights.

No, parties remained not his thing even more than ever now. Didn't even feel bad about ditching.

He was sitting on the stoop of the house he shared with Rick and Michonne and several of the others, smoking the last few cigarettes from the last pack he had while pondering the morning's events.

Aaron had requested his presence and offered him up a shiny new bike in exchange for his help in recruiting. This new place was all about finding more people and bringing them back. All about trying to save whatever was left of humanity out there when they could barely take care of themselves in here. Had only gotten lucky with where they'd ended up location wise and been milking it for all it was worth.

It was an innocent type of stupidity, he thought. Trying to do a good thing and failing to realize that so many of those leftover couldn't be trusted. Would take advantage no matter how well you stalked them beforehand to make sure they weren't the type to gut you when you turned your back.

It wasn't safe. Wasn't something he would have agreed to in the first place if he wasn't completely bored out of his skull amidst the housewives in floral sweaters and kids with dogs. If he didn't do something, anything, to distract himself from thoughts of her, because that was all his brain wanted to conjure up lately, he'd be in a worse state soon enough than he already was.

Spending his days thinking of her had all but consumed him already and it had barely been a week.

He'd wonder what she was doing when he woke up, while he showered and brushed his teeth like a civilized citizen.

Wonder if she was patching someone up or setting a broken bone while he was puttering through the neighborhood taking random tasks to keep busy.

Wonder if she was safe while he stood watch in the tower.

Wonder if she was happy when he finally laid his head on a pillow for the night.

At the rate he was going he had half a mind to leave for a hunt every day he was able just to focus on something that didn't involve a woman he could never have. So when Aaron suggested he help with recruiting, offered him a bike and some sort of purpose he latched onto it faster than he'd expected too. Ignored the protests in the back of his brain about how wrong it was to spend his time scoping out the general public and trying to lure them back like some sort of well intentioned stalker.

He'd probably get a bullet to the brain on one of these missions from someone that thought it was a bullshit attempt to drag them away to slaughter.

Still, maybe he wouldn't. And it was better than holding up here behind the walls like he had nothing better to do than mope.

Aaron seemed nice enough, a nosey bastard in all the ways he tried to poke and prod into his life during dinner the other night, but nice enough all the same. He could do with spending some time with him, could more than handle the separation from the people he came here with.

Rick and the others were assimilating far faster than he was, though he hadn't expected much different. They wanted this after all. Even if a few were hesitant at first, they had come here thinking it held promise for the future and put all their energy into making it work.

He was the one holding onto the past with a grip so tight it threatened to leave a mark. Probably already had.

He dropped the last remnant of the cigarette to the ground and snuffed it out with the worn toe of his boot. Standing to meet the object of his thoughts. Well, one of them anyway.

Aaron was approaching him at a quick pace, practically bouncing with excitement about their first outing which would be today. He didn't want to waste time. Wanted to get out there and start looking again soon as possible and Daryl was grateful for the distraction.

"You ready to hit the road?"

His voice reached Daryl several feet before the man himself did and he could only nod and mumble his agreement.

"Good, good. I've got an idea of where we can start. Been following someone about twenty miles west for a few weeks now. Could be a good time to try and bring him back."

Daryl cocked an eyebrow at him. "You know you sound like you need a restraining order when you say shit like that, right?"

Aaron laughed. "I've been told as much, yes. Hard habit to break, I guess."

Less than an hour later they were heading west, and twenty minutes after that they were trekking through the woods in an attempt to be both stealthy and stalkery at the same time. Heading for the general vicinity of where Aaron had seen this other person the last time he was out searching.

Daryl winced as Aaron spoke through the silence at a volume that was several decibels above what was required. Not for the first time wondering to himself how the hell he'd been able to follow Rick and the others without being spotted since he very clearly had trouble with the silence part of this mission.

"How are you liking it so far? In Alexandria?"

Daryl grunted. "It's all right."

"I hope you don't think I'm overstepping, but you seem…distant. I don't know you well enough yet to know if that's your general demeanor or if you're feeling some sort of way about something, but…"

"Sorta overstepping."

He heard Aaron sigh after he cut him off. Thought maybe he'd stopped this poor excuse for a conversation before it even started and was on his way to feeling relieved about it when the questions came back full force.

"I just wanted to say that if you wanna talk about it, I'm a fairly good listener most of the time."

Jesus christ, this guy didn't quit. Daryl scowled and tried to keep the heat from running up his neck at the thought of someone noticing he was distant and then actually trying to have a discussion with him about his feelings. He didn't do discussions about feelings. He barely did discussions on mundane subjects.

"Ok, well offer stands if you change your mind. You know we're having a thing at the house next week, you should come. There's gonna be more than a few ladies there and it might be a chance to mingle some."

Daryl was tempted to take a bolt from his quiver and shove it through his own skull just to get away from this conversation.

"Ain't lookin to mingle with anyone, already got…"

He caught himself before he could finish that land mine of a sentence. Didn't know what the fuck he was even thinking letting it slip out much as it had. Didn't know what he meant by it anyway.

All ready got someone.

The words attempted to tumble from his lips as easily as he exhaled a breath. He was unconsciously sure of it in that moment. That he had someone.

Did he though? Was that true anymore, or was it ever true to begin with? What were they to each other now that an hour's drive separated them along with a hundred other things?

"Oh, I didn't realize. Who is it? If you don't mind me asking."

He did mind him asking but it seemed pointless to say so now because Aaron wasn't the type to take a hint, or he was, but for whatever reason was choosing to ignore them all today.

"She ain't here."

"Oh. I'm sorry. I know how hard it can be to loose someone."

Daryl spun on his heels, turning to face Aaron in disgruntled frustration. "She ain't dead. She's just not here. Didn't come with us."

"Oh." Aaron's face went from confused to understanding in a split second. "Oh, I see now."

He threw a knowing smile at Daryl that he wasn't sure how to interpret. "Where there's life there's still hope. Something tells me you'll see her again."

Daryl huffed in response. This whole discussion was way beyond anything he ever wanted to have with anyone, let alone some guy he just met a week before. "Can we just focus on what we came out here for?" Aaron nodded. "And keep your voice down, gonna scare away anything with a heartbeat."

They spent the next few hours in relative silence, traipsing through the wooded brush and coming up empty for their efforts. Thoughts of Carol filled his head with every footstep. The fact that he was still hopelessly locked on her while doing an activity he only agreed on to distract himself was not lost on him.


	14. Chapter 14

It was almost dusk when Daryl heard the heavy footfalls coming up the steps. His spot in the tower was usually his alone and he liked the quiet, but tonight's company was expected. Had been requested specifically and Daryl nervously tapped his own boots against the dirty floor while he waited.

He'd gone over what he was going to say a hundred times in his head and still had no clue what would come out of his mouth when Rick's head popped up into view and the other man climbed into the tower with him.

The evening was a peaceful one, nothing on the other side of the wall except rabbits and squirrels and the occasional bird. Rick took up a spot next to him, both sets of eyes peering out into the space beyond and neither one saying much of anything just yet.

Daryl shifted his weight, cast a side long glance in Rick's direction and tried to slow the rapid thumping of his own heart. Was about to open his mouth and see what happened when he was beaten to the punch by Rick who spoke into the darkness without turning.

"When?"

Daryl let out a heavy breath. "Tomorrow morning."

Rick nodded at this, finally turning his head to meet Daryl's eyes and his expression was softer than he'd expected it would be. "It's all right. We'll be ok. Honestly…you lasted longer than I thought you would."

Daryl squinted at that. "Whatdya mean?"

"Been two weeks. Saw it the day we left, how you didn't wanna go. Shoulda said something then but I was being selfish. Wanted you here with us, felt safer about all this with you by my side should something go wrong but…I knew. I already knew."

Daryl pondered this new piece of information. Rick had known. Apparently everyone with eyeballs had known because he certainly had no shortage of people trying to give him advice or lend a sympathetic yet unwanted ear. Faith and Aaron had been more vocal about it, trying in their own ways to get him to open up, but while Rick had been silent he clearly knew just as well as the others.

"You didn't say nothing, but neither did I."

And he hadn't. Had gotten into the car and drove away and never said a word to anyone about how difficult it was or how he'd regretted it every moment since then.

At first, he expected it to get better. That time would soothe the ache and his thoughts would drift less and less to her and more toward the new life they were making here. If anything it had only gotten worse. Carol was the first thing he thought of in the morning and the last thing he pictured at night and all the moments in-between were no different. It was a constant weight on his chest that he was unable to shake no matter how hard he tried.

In the end it wasn't something big that spurred him into action. No heartfelt speech from someone else about grabbing life by the balls. No near death experience. No examples of other people blissfully wrapped up in each other to kick his brain into high gear and show him what he was missing.

The turning point was much smaller than that. It snuck up on him at random. Crawled up the tower one easy, quiet night while he stood watch and smacked him lightly upside the head.

He simply didn't want to spend another day without her and decided to stop pretending he could.

The fact that Rick was ahead of the game and already knew his intentions was both a surprise and a relief. Daryl wasn't sure he could have argued about it. Didn't want to leave this place behind on anything but good terms. Was more than grateful he wouldn't have too.

Rick stood back from the railing and clasped him on the shoulder. "Tell her we miss her. That she's always welcome here. That goes for both of you, if you ever change your mind."

"I'll tell her."

For a moment Rick look conflicted, like he would pull him into a hug or backtrack and ask him to reconsider but he only gave a half smile and headed back down the steps, disappearing from the tower and leaving Daryl alone to finish out his shift on watch.

The night dragged on slower than ever and he could only sit and wait, counting the minutes until he'd be able to leave Alexandria behind and start moving forward with her.

* * *

The next morning Daryl was packed and ready to leave before the sun even struggled into view. The night before, even after his conversation with Rick he had been slightly unsure of his decision. Worried he was leaving the others too soon, before they'd settled enough, before it was really safe. Worried about the reception he'd get when he arrived at the farm. But today those thoughts gave way to nothing but excitement and waiting until after dawn was a monumental task.

Daryl was never one for goodbyes. Trusted that Rick would tell the others and that they would forgive him for not doing it himself. The one person he did speak to was Aaron, asking to take the bike for longer than a few days and promising to bring it back when he was able.

Aaron had only smiled and nodded and told him good luck. Not for the first time Daryl wondered how everyone else seemed to be so far ahead of him when it came to his decisions regarding Carol.

He was already on the bike, ready to rev the engine and get the hell out of dodge when Aaron jogged up, holding an envelope and struggling for breath.

"Oh good, I caught you. I have something for Buffy, if you don't mind giving it to her. It's an outline of what we have available to trade, she asked me to put something together last time we spoke."

Daryl nodded and tucked the paper away in his pocket. "Will do."

"Have a safe trip."

Aaron received a grunt of acknowledgment in return, the roar of the bike eliminating further conversation.

When Daryl passed through the gates only thoughts of the future passed along with him.

* * *

The greeting he received as he rode up to the farm was exactly what he expected. Several of the girls blocked the way, pointing weapons at him and looking entirely too imposing for their own good until they realized who it was and wariness gave way to expressions of surprise.

Daryl rolled the bike up to the front of the house quietly, not wanting to make a scene with the loud engine and left it there as he headed for the first place in his mental list of options for where she might be.

The shed was quiet and still from the outside but he took his chances anyway and softly pushed open the small door. The sight of her with her back to him in the kitchen nearly took his breath away and she hadn't even looked at him yet.

"Dawn? Did you find the thing? It was there last time I looked but I don't know. It could have grown legs and walked away on it's own…"

She'd turned then, facing him mid sentence and sucking in a hard breath when her eyes landed on his face.

Carol's hand gripped the edge of the kitchen counter, expression compiled of a dozen different emotions that he wouldn't be able to place if he tried. So he didn't. Just watched her watching him and he wouldn't have been surprised if his own face mirrored hers.

"What's wrong? Is everything ok? Did something happen?"

She snapped out of her stupor and approached him cautiously, suddenly terrified. Her eyes searching his for reasons why he would be standing here when he'd left for good only two weeks prior. Naturally conjuring up the worst.

"Nothin' happened."

His words were calm and easy and he waited for her to put the pieces together on her own. Half because he wasn't sure he could explain it and half because he wanted to know that she would. That the conclusion was just as obvious as he thought it should be.

He could see her brow creasing, knitting together in the middle while she ran through possibilities. Saw the moment when she landed on the right one and turned from confused to knowing.

"You can't. You can't be here. You belong…"

"Here. I belong here. With you." He cut her off before she could finish. His matter of fact tone slicing through the tension and bridging the space between them. Bought a hand up to her cheek, stroking the pad of his thumb there and watched as her resolve crumbled beneath his fingertips.

Her voice was barely a whisper when she spoke, hopeful and disbelieving all at once as her eyes bore into his. "Are you sure?"

"Never been so sure of anything." He paused, his own self doubt nagging at him for a split second and he couldn't stop the next words from tumbling out. "If you'll have me."

She smiled then and he knew it was genuine because it crinkled her eyes and washed away the apprehension that previously clouded her features. Small hands with tapered fingers went to the sides of his face, pausing for a moment before pulling him to her and responding with a gentle press of her lips against his own. Slow and sweet and everything he thought it would be.

The words she breathed into his mouth once they parted soothed every ounce of him that could have held a doubt.

"Welcome home."

"You all owe me the next bag of red vines." Faith flashed a smug grin to Buffy, Dawn and Xander as they gathered around the kitchen island.

"What? No way. I said two weeks! I called that!" Dawn folded her arms, glaring at Faith.

"Technically it's not midnight yet so it's still only thirteen days which means my guess of 10 days wins."

"I don't think this works how you think it works."

"Pshhh, we have rules here, Little D. And the rules say my bet on how long it'll take Dixon to come back wins this round."

"This game is rigged."

Faith only laughed at Dawn and Buffy just smiled. "I'm not getting involved in this. I already lost with my three day guesstimation."

Xander nodded. "Yeah, I gave it a month so clearly I'm out of this race too."

Faith sighed. "All right, double or nothing. Next bet is how long it'll take them to start making the shed shake."

Dawn wrinkled her nose. "You're so wrong." Tilted her head and raised an eyebrow before continuing. "I say tonight."

Faith clapped her hands together loudly and jumped down off the counter, pointing at Dawn with confidence. "You're on! I give it a week and once it happens we won't see either of them for days. They'll totally disappear in there."

Placing of bets and discussions on how the results would be judged continued for the next several minutes, unknown to anyone that this particular game would have a clear winner in the not so distant future.

Later that night moonlight filtered through the windows of the tiny shed Daryl and Carol shared, illuminating long stretches of bare skin. She had finally gotten him to share the bed with her, only this time it didn't take any coaxing at all.

A trail of clothes and undergarments lead the way from the door to the bedroom, telling the story of what occurred only a few hours earlier.

His arm curled around her waist as he pressed himself along her back and she covered it with one of her own. Puffs of breath on the back of her neck sent a shiver down her spine and he shifted the blankets higher over them before pulling her closer. "Cold?"

The corners of her mouth turned up and she snuggled into the warmth that radiated out from him and seeped into her own skin. "I'm good."

* * *

 **End Notes:**

 **That's it for this one ya'll. And Faith was half right, no one is gonna see them for days ;)**


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